


The Bongo Experimentation

by Ultra



Category: The Big Bang Theory (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Awkward Conversations, Awkward Romance, Break Up, Crazy, Episode: s05e18 The Werewolf Transformation, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Getting Together, Kissing, Season/Series 05, Star Trek References, Star Wars References
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-09
Updated: 2014-10-09
Packaged: 2019-05-14 03:25:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 38,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14761691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ultra/pseuds/Ultra
Summary: When Sheldon lets anarchy into his life (when he can't get his haircut as he wants) what if Penny becomes a larger part of the crazy he allows to take over? In the end, that can only be a good thing... right?





	1. Chapter 1

“I have spent my whole life trying to bring order to the universe by carefully planning every moment of every day,” Sheldon explained what Leonard and Penny already knew. “But all my efforts, our dinner schedule, my pyjama rotation, my bowel movement spreadsheet, it’s clear now, I’ve been wasting my time,” he explained with a wave of his hand.

Penny was astounded. She never heard Sheldon talk this way. It had been startling enough when he didn’t go crazy over the fact she was sitting in his spot, and now he seemed willing to abandon all his whack-a-doodle forms of organisation, because he finally realised the world wouldn’t end just because something changed. That in itself made her feel like the Earth was spinning the wrong way, and yet it had to be a good thing for her friend.

“Y’know, Sheldon, sometimes it’s nice not knowing what’s coming,” she told him, leaning on the counter opposite where he was making a drink. “I mean, look at me and Leonard. We went out, we broke up, now we’re trying again. We don’t know what’s gonna happen.”

“Oh, please,” the physicist rolled his eyes. “Everyone knows what’s going to happen,” he told her with a look she didn’t care to meet.

Penny hated knowing he was right. She knew her and Leonard were never going to really work out, no happily ever after was swimming around on their horizon. He was a good friend, someone to fall back on when things got rough. He wasn’t her knight in shining armour, not a hero, not good enough to make her heart pound with a kiss or passionate enough to truly excite her in the bedroom. He was a nice guy, that was all she could really say, a friend with benefits in so many ways.

Somewhere along the line, Penny had zoned out and came to after Sheldon declared he would ‘embrace the chaos’ and Leonard asked what he wanted to do first.

“I don’t know,” his friend said with an odd tone to his voice. “I could do anything,” he smiled as he rounded the edge of the counter, his eyes fixed on Penny then.

She wasn’t sure how to take that look. From any other man, she might have been able to guess where their intentions lie. When it came to Sheldon, she had almost learnt all his quirks well enough to second guess him, but this was different. This was like being faced with a new man, a completely different person. He was Sheldon unbound, capable of anything, and Penny found she couldn’t breathe as she waited to see what he would do next.

“All bets are off. The world is my oyster,” said Sheldon as he considered his next move.

There were approximately one thousand, four hundred, and eighty nine things he had considered over his years of restraint that he knew he could never actually do. They ran from the mundane of wearing Saturday’s underwear on a Thursday, to the crazy and wild. Most of that deranged end of the spectrum seemed to involve Penny in some way or other, Sheldon realised, as he recalled so many things that came into his mind but were never done, never even spoken of or seriously considered until this moment.

It never really occurred to Sheldon not to make a move on Penny simply because Leonard liked her and fancied to make some kind of incomprehensible and impossible fairytale ending with her. No, Sheldon had certain ideas about keeping his life ordered and organised. Penny was the very opposite of these things. Messy and wild, and whilst she was usually in a clean and fresh-smiling state herself, the idea of getting as close to her as Leonard dared was too frightening a thing for poor Sheldon to really consider on hygiene grounds alone.

He had been standing there too long, staring like a dumb mute at his room-mate’s girlfriend. Going wild was all well and good, and doing so with Penny might be exhilarating, but Sheldon couldn’t do it. Maybe it was his friendship with Leonard that stooped him, maybe it was the hygiene angle, it might even have been thoughts of Amy Farrah-Fowler, though he highly doubted that last one. No, Sheldon knew he just hadn’t the guts to go that far, not right now. He allowed himself an almost inaudible sigh of defeat before painting on a smile.

“I’ve got it,” he said, turning his attention more towards Leonard then. “I’m going to put on my Tuesday pyjamas tonight,” he told his friend, before practically running away to his bedroom.

Penny let out a breath she hardly knew she’d been holding then. She was oddly disappointed that Sheldon’s boundary-pushing had only extended as far as pyjamas. If his aim was to shake things up in the bedroom, she could have shown him all kinds of better ways. The blonde’s mouth dropped open wide when she realised what thoughts she had just been having. Sex with Sheldon, the idea ought never to enter her head, not at all, and yet there it was and somehow it wasn’t half bad. She forced a neutral look when she realised Leonard was turning to speak to her, expressing worry for his friend’s ‘condition’.

“He’ll be fine,” she waved away his concern, more bothered by the tripping out of her own brain than Sheldon’s right now. “I, er... I’m gonna go,” she said, leaving fast.

Leonard was a little bemused not to get so much as a goodbye kiss before she left. Penny acted weird sometimes though, and the physicist told himself that was probably how all beautiful women acted with their boyfriends. After all, she was really the only one he ever dated so he had no frame of reference. He chose not to worry about it and moved back to the couch to put away the chess pieces - he still couldn’t figure out how Penny beat him so easily on her first game!

Vaguely, Leonard wondered if maybe Sheldon had tried to teach chess to Penny before. They did spend quite a bit of time together during the latest break up between the odd couple who were now giving it another try. Still, it would be strange for Sheldon not to mention it, he did so like to crow about being able to teach Penny or any other ‘normal’ person a new skill. However unflattering it seemed, to Sheldon such a thing was akin to training an ape.

“Er, Sheldon,” he called, tapping on his friend’s bedroom door. “You never taught Penny anything about chess, did you?” he checked.

Sheldon stopped half way through buttoning up his pyjama shirt. The moment Leonard mentioned Penny he forgot to breathe somehow. It was as if he were panicking but he wasn’t sure why he should. Leonard was not smart enough to read minds, even Sheldon wasn’t so far advanced in his mental powers as to achieve that. Focusing on the actual question asked, Sheldon answered quickly and succinctly.

“No, Leonard, I never played chess with Penny, or tried to teach her anything about the game,” he assured his friend.

In a moment, Leonard was gone, muttering his way down the hall. Sheldon didn’t hear a word. He sat down on the edge of his bed in silence, feeling troubled. As if his journey into chaos were not strange enough, now his mind seemed to be fixating on Penny without his meaning for it too. He had such a ridiculously strong urge to touch her, to go completely crazy and just grab her and kiss her, like some overzealous, wrongly labelled ‘hero’ in one of those ridiculous so-called romantic movies that the blonde herself enjoyed at times. Sheldon was not a kisser, he kept a safe and reasonable distance from all people, even avoiding handshakes whenever possible. It was true that he had thrown the rule book out of the window tonight, but there still had to be limits, didn’t there?

“Oh, this is preposterous,” Sheldon muttered to himself as he finished buttoning his shirt and got into bed.

Not everything he did in his new chaotic persona had to be about Penny, it couldn’t and wouldn’t be so. Leonard would not appreciate his room-mate even thinking about his girlfriend that way, and Sheldon could remain a man of honour, even as he embraced possible chaos. No need to step over too many boundaries all at once, he told himself, and began to think of other things he might do tomorrow instead of going to work.

In a universe of infinite possibilities, with none of his own rules to bind him, and not caring for those laid down by anyone else, what should Sheldon do? What would Spock do? What would his fellow scientists do?

It might have been mere minutes or a great many hours, as Dr Sheldon Cooper drifted in and out of sleep, wondering on all the wonderful, exiting, thrilling things he could do with his young life.

Sheldon was hardly aware of the fact it was past midnight, when he suddenly sat bolt upright in bed, knowing what exactly he wanted to do. He wouldn’t wait until morning, daylight would make no difference now. In amongst his wonderings on the great minds of history and their eccentricities, Sheldon had thought of Richard Feynman. He had to get up, he had to go now. There was no doubt at all in Sheldon’s mind that what he really needed to do was play bongos!


	2. Chapter 2

It was three in the morning, which as far as Sheldon could tell was an excellent time for playing bongos. He wasn’t sure if it was the rhythm he was hammering out or the fact he was sat here alone in the dark at the wrong end of the couch that made it feel so good. Perhaps there was another reason, but he declined to let his mind wander too far into that particular realm of thinking. It had to do with ways to wake up Penny and get her attention, and none of that could lead to any good.

The only person he seemed to have summoned to his impromptu bongo concert so far was Leonard, and the little guy didn’t exactly look thrilled to be there anyway.

“Hello, Leonard, do you like my bongos?” asked Sheldon, beating out a rhythm to his words like some kind of hippie poet from decades before. “Bet you didn’t know that I had bongos.”

That was how the odd altercation began and continued, whilst across the hall Penny woke up with a banging in her head that she blamed on the copious amounts of wine, at least at first. She had started drinking just as soon as she got home, convinced she needed something to calm down her brain activity that had gone into over-drive, and all over Sheldon Cooper.

Penny always wondered if she was a little crazy, hanging out with the guys and all. Lately, spending so much time with Amy, it wouldn’t be a stretch to think a little of her fruit loopyness had rubbed off either, but it was only today when Penny had really realised how nuts she might be. Thinking about sex with Sheldon, yeah, that was a new level of whack-a-doodle that she couldn’t even quantify. Then she had started giggling when she realised she just used a ‘sciencey’ word and poured herself another glass.

It was a few minutes before she realised she was about to pass out on the couch that Penny had taken herself off to bed. She couldn’t understand why she was now awake again, past three in the morning, with a pounding in her head. That didn’t usually happen until much later in the day. Unless of course the banging drum was outside of her own brain. It was Leonard yelling ‘Stop it!’ over and over that made her realise the truth.

Getting up out of bed with a growl of frustration, she stomped over to the boys’ apartment and pushed open the door without even thinking. It was a little shocking to find it unlocked at night. Sheldon was usually so crazy about predators and burglars and all, but then this was Sheldon 2.0 - the crazy chaos-embracing version.

“Why did you get bongos?” she asked the physicist with no lack of frustration, pushing her messed up hair out of her face.

There was some explanation coming out of his mouth and then out of Leonard about another scientist that played the instrument in question. Penny didn’t hear the answer. Even at three in the morning, seeing Sheldon on the wrong end of the couch was shocking enough to make her start. What caught her attention next was the grin on his face. He was happy. Sheldon was as giddy as a hillbilly kid who just stumbled into Daddy’s meth lab.

It occurred to Penny that Sheldon rarely looked so happy about anything. Getting him to smile genuinely at people was a tough gig, and even his favourite DVD boxsets or comic books never made him look quite so smiley and carefree. Hell, she was pretty sure this was a bigger smile than he even wore for koala bears!

There was a freedom that came with not living by the rules, this Penny knew very well herself. She had few regulations in her own life, to be truthful, and even less she hadn’t gone ahead and broken anyway. For Sheldon, who had self-imposed rules on just about everything, this experience of doing whatever he liked whenever he wanted must be so freeing, so good for him. Suddenly, Penny couldn’t actually mind too much that she’d been woken at some ungodly hour by bongos.

Sheldon looked oddly at Leonard as his friend tried in vain to get him to see reason. He wanted him to go to bed, consider work in the morning, adhere to the room-mate agreement. He just wasn’t listening, and honestly, Penny kinda wanted to cheer for him. She didn’t know for sure, but as smart as Sheldon was, all the work he had done, he must be loaded. If he wanted to quit his job, he’d survive, and probably be much happier, whether he did or did not in fact start the bongo band he spoke of.

Their ridiculous semi-argument over with, Sheldon got up from the couch and turned away from Leonard. It was only then Penny noticed she was stood in the doorway, blocking the bongo player’s escape route. Even when she noticed she didn’t move, she just stared up at that smile on Sheldon’s face, the bright clear look in his eyes like he was seeing the world properly for the first time and loving every second. It made her smile too.

“Where are you going?” she asked, wondering when her voice got so soft, almost wanting to say that wherever it was she’d go with him.

Hell, running around Pasadena in the middle of the night with chaotic-minded Sheldon sounded like more fun than it should. Of course, the true answer to her question was that Sheldon didn’t know the answer. This whole night was unplanned and unprecedented. Everything was usually laid out so carefully both in his physical world and in his mind. It was genuinely freeing to just do whatever one felt like from moment to moment, damning any consequences that might not come. For the first time in his life, Sheldon was risking the fact that Einstein had been wrong, that actions did not have reactions, that consequences did not exist, or if they did, they were not so bad as he had thought before.

In this moment, he would go wherever he wanted, do whatever he wanted, and nothing bad would happen. Only good things seemed to be happening tonight, like buying bongos. Penny still wanted to know where he was going, and there was only one response Sheldon wanted to give to that in this moment.

“Wherever the music takes me, kitten,” he told her, with a lot more Southern drawl than she’d heard him use in long time.

What startled Penny more than the accent was the arm around her back that suddenly pulled her in close, and then there were lips on hers. Sheldon’s lips on hers. She hadn’t had time to breathe because she was never in her life expecting this to happen. A kiss with Sheldon, the idea would have made her shudder before, and yet experiencing it was not gross or even weird. Hell, it was pretty hot!

For a guy with no experience, or so he had told her, the man could kiss. Maybe he read a book about it or studied other people doing it? Penny couldn’t think about that now. She could barely hear Leonard yelling at them for what they were doing. It was only then Penny realised that Sheldon wasn’t just kissing her, she had been kissing back, as well as being practically bent over backwards in a dip to end all dips whilst it was happening.

“Hmm, interesting,” said Sheldon when he finally let her go, barely sparing the time to put Penny back on her feet before he walked out.

All bruised lips and wobbly knees, the blonde put one hand over her mouth and stared wide eyed after the man that literally took her breath away.

“What the hell just happened?” asked Leonard, taking the words right out of Penny’s mind, she was sure of it.

Honestly, she had no explanation, and doubted Sheldon had either. He was now halfway down the stairs, back to singing about the wonder of his bongos. The truth was, Dr Cooper was no less confused by his behaviour than Penny was. He didn’t kiss women, unless it was his mother and that was hardly the same thing. A peck on the cheek of Momma or Meemaw, even Missy, just didn’t count as kissing a girl. There was Amy, but she always initiated any kind of closeness between them and Sheldon knew for sure that kissing Penny would be vastly different, even before he tried it.

Though his legs carried Sheldon down the stairs and out of the front door of the building, he wasn’t really thinking about where he was going. Beating out a feint and random rhythm on his bongos, his mind wandered to Penny and only her.

There was no explanation, not even any forethought to his kissing her. In his new state of chaos, Sheldon operated purely on instinct, desire, and dreams now, with as little actual thought as possible. The more he tried to live without the rules, the more he liked it, the more he wished to further embrace it. Of course he hadn’t quite considered how much he wished to embrace Penny until it happened.

It was only now he had stopped walking, his hand still on top of the bongo skins, that Sheldon realised people were staring. These were unsavoury folks out in the dark. Probably sailors and harlots, and he was out here alone, in his nightwear. Even allowing chaos to reign did not mean Sheldon wished to be attacked, propositioned, or otherwise used. Going home seemed like a non-option with Leonard and Penny still there. On some level, even Dr Cooper knew he might have crossed some kind of line, kissing a woman who was supposed to be dating his friend. Amy would understand. Good old reliable Amy Farrah-Fowler who would forgive him almost anything and saw Penny as some kind of figure to be worshipped. She was surely understand his predicament.

“Excuse me...” said a voice Sheldon barely heard, but he definitely felt the stranger’s hand on his shoulder.

With a yelp, the scientist took off at a run, with a death grip on his bongos, and a flailing step akin to Kermit the Frog having a panic attack. He wouldn’t stop until he reached Amy’s door.


	3. Chapter 3

Leonard hadn’t said a word for five whole minutes. Penny couldn’t really complain since she hadn’t spoken either. Honestly, she still felt in a state of shock. Sheldon had kissed her. Sheldon Cooper, the gangly oddball from across the hall, who called sex ‘coitus’ and went crazy if another person so much as breathed near his food or sat in his spot. He had kissed her, a full-on lip-lock, that was hot enough to make her toes curl. Penny couldn’t explain it, not why he did it or why she responded. If she tried she had a feeling her head would explode with the effort, and yet she just knew that before long Leonard was going to ask.

“What the hell just happened?” he said eventually, just as Penny expected him too.

“I... I don’t know,” she forced out, her hand finally dropping away from her lips. “I mean, Sheldon, he’s... he’s gone...”

She whistled and spun her fingers by her head in some kind of gesture that seemed to signify ‘crazy’ to her boyfriend. Penny wasn’t sure he was buying that this whole thing was Sheldon’s fault. After all, she had kind of kissed him back. No shoving or struggling, no slapping his face. Penny had kissed Sheldon just as much as he kissed her, and Leonard had seen the whole thing. There was simply no denying anything, even if she wanted to.

“I get that Sheldon is quirky, we all know that,” Leonard said snippily. “He’s decided to let his life go to anarchy, and that’s his crazy-ass choice. What I don’t understand is why you just let him kiss you like that!”

Penny opened her mouth to answer only to close it again fast. She didn’t have an explanation. Her brain had established that long before her boyfriend ever asked the question. Somehow she hoped she would come up with something in the in-between time. No such luck.

“I was just... floored,” she said eventually. “Shock is a weird thing, and honestly, I’d’ve been less surprised if Sheldon put the moves on you!” she said, flinging her arms around in some over the top but emphatic gestures.

It was a lie, a complete and total one. Sure, she genuinely was shocked when Sheldon grabbed her and laid his lips on hers, but she had been pretty sure for a while now that he did lean towards women rather than men, if he leaned at all. For all of his talk about being practically asexual, he did spend plenty of time trying to sneak looks that time she was naked in front of him. Even when he realised he had grabbed her boob rather than her arm, he hadn’t been in a huge hurry to let go. Of course, thinking of this now was not helping anyone.

“I can’t believe this,” muttered Leonard, walking away towards the kitchen, but then immediately circling back. “I should’ve hit him. I should’ve. For God sakes, you should’ve hit him!”

“What? I’m not hitting Sheldon, and neither are you,” said Penny, putting her hands on her hips. “This was something and nothing, just Sheldon going all ‘chaos theory’ and acting out. It didn’t mean anything.”

“You really think that’s all it was?” asked Leonard immediately, watching her closely.

He wasn’t buying it. Penny always thought she was crazy when she looked at Sheldon and thought maybe he was looking at her with more than his usual glance. He did like to spend time with her, even when she and Leonard were broken up. She was the one he ran to with his problems or when he was sick, then there was his reaction when she was naked. All in all, with any other guy, she would come to the conclusion that he probably did like her that way, but this was Sheldon Cooper. The idea of him liking any woman that way seemed so completely unlikely, and that included Amy Farrah-Fowler who was technically his girlfriend. Penny couldn’t imagine Sheldon ever kissed Amy the way he just kissed her. For one thing the nerd girl would’ve wanted to share that particular piece of information with everybody ever. Besides, until today when Sheldon decided to put a little crazy into his life, there was no chance of him even considering that kind of behaviour.

“Are you even listening to me?” asked Leonard when he realised Penny was looking elsewhere and not responding to any of his points about Sheldon.

“Of course I am,” she lied. “Or, y’know, the other thing.”

It was insane. She had done nothing in the last five to ten minutes but lie her ass off to a man that was supposed to be her boyfriend, who she was supposed to love. The truth was, she did love Leonard. He was kind of her best friend in a lot of ways. He knew everything about her, he rarely judged, and they got along great. The sex was less eventful than she’d like, and they really did have trouble keeping a romantic relationship running. It made her wonder sometimes why they bothered trying. Penny always got a horrible sick feeling in the pit of her stomach when she got close to admitting, even to herself, that she got back together with Leonard so often because it was easy, because it was better than being alone.

“Shouldn’t we go after Sheldon?” she said after a moment’s pause, her hand to her forehead as something in her brain started to pound worse now than when she could hear bongos! “He’s out alone in the dark, in his pyjamas...”

“He’s not a child,” Leonard complained. “Besides he wanted anarchy, that’s exactly what he’ll get on the streets of Pasadena at three a.m.”

Penny’s eyes went wide at his attitude. He had his arms folded over his chest and was practically stomping his foot like a petulant child. Penny would’ve smiled when she realised she got that word from Sheldon, but she was too mad to feel good about anything right now.

“You know what he’s like in unfamiliar surroundings, and how he feels about the streets at night,” she told him crossly. “The state he’s in right now, he could get himself killed! Some friend you are.”

She was muttering by the end as she turned and left, slamming the door to her own apartment, even when Leonard called her name behind her. Penny couldn’t deal with him right now, she was too angry and far too confused. It wasn’t all his fault. Yes, she had hoped that a missing friend who might be in danger would be more important to her boyfriend than petty jealousy. At the same time, if Sheldon had been any other guy daring to kiss her like that, she would have gone crazy. She’d have been beyond mad if the shoe was on the other foot, if some girl had kissed Leonard that way, and right in front of her too.

“Get dressed,” Penny told herself just as soon as she realised she was still stood half way to the bedroom, staring into space.

She meant what she said to Leonard, they needed to go and look for Sheldon, make sure he was okay. As she threw off her nightwear and wriggled into a pair of jeans and a clean top, Penny mulled it over. The chances were good that if Sheldon got scared in the dark or startled by strangers, he’d run for familiar ground. What she really couldn’t explain was the knot in her stomach when she realised the most likely safe spot he would head for was Amy’s apartment.

* * *

“Not that I’m complaining, but why is it that you’re here at such an hour, Sheldon?” asked Amy as she poured tea into two cups.

When he first arrived, bongos in hand, poor Amy had assumed it was some kind of musical booty call from her boyfriend. No such luck, as he had quickly informed her. There seemed to have been some kind of incident in the street, at least that was what Sheldon quickly told her, before moving onto talk of his bongos and how he had them because Richard Feynman had bongos.

“And I don’t have to tell you who Richard Feynman is,” he had said with an odd smile. “He is not a purple leprechaun that lives inside of anyone’s rectal cavity.”

Yeah, that part had Amy confused, even more than Sheldon showing up on her doorstep at three a.m. in his nightwear, with bongos under his arm.

“Can’t a person drop in on a friend, especially a girlfriend, at any time of day or night?” asked Sheldon, just a little too cryptic for Amy’s liking, as she handed him his tea.

One sip and he made a face, stopping her in her tracks when she opened her mouth to answer his counter-question.

“Y’know which tea I like best? Long Island Iced Tea,” he sighed happily at the thought.

Amy frowned. Sheldon really didn’t drink as a rule. A sip of wine at an occasion perhaps, but that was all. She had heard tales of what he could get up to if he really went to town on the booze, tales that ended with his pants coming off.

“I can make Long Island Iced Tea,” she said quickly, scrambling back to the kitchen so fast that she almost fell on her face half way there.

Sheldon wasn’t really paying attention. His mind kept wandering. Now that he had let chaos and anarchy into his life, no rules to live to, things were actually a lot more complicated than before. Staying faithful to Amy had never been a consideration because no woman was really of interest to him that way, not even his so-called girlfriend actually. Now he felt he ought to confess his kiss with Penny, even if he really had no explanation to give for his behaviour.

Then he thought of Leonard and how he had betrayed him too. Sheldon was supposed to be Leonard’s best friend, and vice versa. Though he knew little of what he believed was colloquially called ‘The Bro Code’, Sheldon did understand that kissing a woman who was in a relationship with one’s friend, best or otherwise, was taboo, or even completely unacceptable. There may have to be a dual or something. Not that it would matter, Sheldon would doubtless win any contest of that kind, but he would miss Leonard if he were forced to run him through.

“One Long Island Iced Tea,” said Amy with a grin as she presented the drink to Sheldon.

It wasn’t quite as it should be, since she didn’t have the exact ingredients to hand, but she hoped it was good enough that Sheldon would drink it without complaint. He took a long swig and made a face that showed surprise but there was a smile in there too.

“Yup, just as I remember. A real kick in the pants,” he told her. “The aftertaste is a little... hmm, I don’t know exactly how to describe, but then food and drink made domestically often tastes a little different to its restaurant counterpart,” he sighed, taking another drink before putting the glass down carefully on the table.

“So, here we are,” said Amy with a wide smile. “Just two people, boyfriend and girlfriend, alone on the couch at three a.m.,” she sighed, inching closer across the couch cushions.

Just as her hand strayed to Sheldon’s knee, he leapt up.

“Amy, I kissed Penny,” he said quickly, making her look up at him in shock.

“You? You kissed Penny?” she asked, as if the concept of it were the most insane thing she ever heard.

“I did,” admitted Sheldon with a single nod, immediately picking up his glass and downing several more gulps of iced tea. “I know this goes against our boyfriend-girlfriend agreement, and even the general moral and ethical conduct I set for myself,” he explained. “I have no real explanation for my actions...”

“None needed,” said Amy, making a cutting motion with her hand to draw a line under the whole thing. “I can only assume she made you an offer you couldn’t refuse, and I can understand that. In your position, I would’ve done the same thing and submitted to the moment.”

By the end of what she was saying her voice was no more than a breathy whisper and Sheldon frowned at the reaction to his confession. As he understood it, faithful girlfriends were supposed to be affronted if their boyfriends betrayed them by engaging in any kind of physical contact with another woman... or man, for that matter. Of course, Amy wasn’t like other women. Sometimes that was a good thing, sometimes not.

“I’m sure I never knew another person more enamoured with Penny than you, Amy Farrah-Fowler,” he said definitely. “And that includes both Leonard and myself.”

Sheldon sat down heavily in his seat, drinking down the last of his tea. His brow wrinkled twice as hard as he replayed his own words in his head then. He wasn’t enamoured with Penny, that was a preposterous thing for him to have said, and he didn’t know why he ever would.

“I can’t deny that Penny is the finest specimen of a woman I have ever met,” said Amy then, cutting into Sheldon’s thought unbidden. “She’s so sweet and kind... and sometimes she makes me wonder exactly who my loins burn harder for, her or you,” she admitted, eyes dipping to the carpet.

Sheldon didn’t know what to think now. First he had to deal with his own feelings for Penny that he couldn’t understand, and now Amy was confessing that she really was having almost the same problem entirely. Where they went from here, Sheldon had no idea, but he was clear on one fact;

“Amy? Please make more iced tea.”


	4. Chapter 4

“For the last time, Leonard, it didn’t mean anything!” Penny yelled as they came down the hall towards Amy’s apartment.

He had followed her across the hall when she walked out on him, determined their conversation wasn’t over. Leonard found his girlfriend already dressed and hunting down her keys. She was serious about going to look for Sheldon, and though they had another round of their stupid fight before hand, he did eventually go get dressed himself, insisting he was going with Penny to find their missing friend.

Penny couldn’t decide if her boyfriend was coming with her out of genuine concern for Sheldon, or if he was just worried what would happen between his friend and his girlfriend if they were left alone in the dark somewhere. The very thought made Penny shiver in a strange way. She had no sexual or romantic feelings for Sheldon! It would be like being attracted to a robot or a child, or a weird hybrid robot-child. She tried to tell herself all that was true, and yet she couldn’t help but think of that kiss Sheldon had laid on her before he left the apartment tonight. That was not a move a child or a robot could make. That was a man kissing her back there in the Cooper-Hofstader homestead. A man that had pretty much made her toes curl. Penny couldn’t explain it, not to Leonard and not to herself. He had tried to press her, question her, cajole her, the whole drive around town and the final leg of the journey to Amy’s house. The only time he was quiet and not bugging Penny was when she had him actually call Sheldon’s girlfriend and check if he was over at her place.

It was both a relief and a horrible blow to realise that was just exactly where he had gone. Penny couldn’t explain that either. She didn’t want Sheldon out on the street, in the dark, freaking out at every bump and sound. At least at Amy’s place he was safe, figuratively speaking. Penny knew how desperate Amy was to get Sheldon into bed. She talked of little else lately, just wanting to get her some kisses, some serious loving. Penny didn’t really like to hear about it before anyway, but now just thinking on it made her feel nauseous. She told herself it was because prior to tonight she never thought for a moment Sheldon would make a move, or even allow Amy the chance to initiate anything of significance. Now the rules had changed, in that there were no rules. If Sheldon was willing to kiss Penny all out of the blue, God only knew what he would be willing to do with Amy, his actual girlfriend. Penny swallowed hard and tried to put it out of her head. Leonard made it impossible, starting up another round of their latest fight. They fought a lot lately, and Penny tried to care about that. Sometimes she wondered if it wasn’t better when she and Leonard were apart. She struggled to recall why they got together again, except for the fact she was lonely and so very tired of being a single girl. It seemed like lame reasoning for rekindling a romance. Right now, Penny wondered if it was really all that romantic at all. Some mediocre sex, a few nice gifts, a friend to talk to, and a person to snuggle with when she was lonely. That didn’t have to be Leonard, it could’ve been anybody. Right now, she wasn’t sure why it was ever Leonard in the first place, if she were honest.

“I’m just a little confused as to why, of all people, Sheldon would kiss you, if there wasn’t some encouragement going on,” he snapped at her, arms folded across his chest all indignantly.

Penny let out a long breath.

“What do you want me to say, Leonard?” she asked, pushing stray hair back behind both ears. “Seriously? What do you want from me? You want me to tell you I’ve been parading in front of Sheldon in my underwear to get his attention? Coming onto him in the laundry room? Batting my eyes while I talk about Star Trek, or Battlestar, or whatever the heck else Dr Whack-a-doodle is into, so he’ll lay his lips on me the first time he decides to take a break from his routine nuttiness?” she asked, too loudly.

Leonard squirmed.

“Did you do any of that?” he eventually asked in a small voice.

Penny let out a sound of pure frustration as she seriously considered smacking her head against the wall. Instead she let out her frustrations on Amy’s door, slamming her hand against the wood, rather thanknocking carefully and quietly. It didn’t take long for the bespectacled little woman to appear, with a wide smile when she realised Penny had arrived.

“Please tell me he’s still here?” asked the blonde, only for Amy to open the door wider and allow Penny and Leonard to see Sheldon stretched out on the couch.

He had clearly been sleeping there, but the overly loud knocking on the door had woken him with a bit of a start.

“This is where you were all night? On Amy’s couch?” asked Penny, hands on her hips as she stared at Sheldon like an angry mother.

“Yeah, there are only so many times a woman can say ‘how about the bed?’” Amy grumbled, though nobody really heard or paid any attention.

Sheldon wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say. His head was throbbing, akin to a man playing a bass drum rather violently... if the bass drum was in fact his brain. Sheldon rarely used such analogies, he never had a need before. It was only after three of Amy’s ice teas that he realised they must be alcoholic. After that, everything was a bit of a blur. He was only happy to realise he was still wearing all the clothes he had come here in!

“Penny, please don’t yell,” he said quietly, one hand going to the side of his head as he gingerly sat up straight. “I think I discovered my very definite limit on Long Island Ice Tea last night.”

“Ooh, ouch,” said Penny with some genuine sympathy as she realised what was wrong.

Amy got him drunk and still Sheldon wouldn’t sleep with her. Penny wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. Such ridiculous situations had presented themselves since Sheldon decided to throw all the rules out the window. To think a haircut, or rather the lack of one, had started all this in the first place.

“Sweetie, you’ll be okay” she said gently as she sat down beside him and rubbed his back more out of habit and instinct than anything else, she supposed. “Couple of aspirin, a lot of water, and some sleep. It’ll get better.”

“I don’t like hangovers,” said Sheldon, shaking his head very carefully. “Since I assume that is what I’m experiencing.”

“Seems like,” Penny nodded, looking genuinely sorry for him. “Next time, stick to regular tea, okay?”

Amy hurried off to the bathroom cabinet to find aspirin, and no-one really noticed her go. Penny’s attention was all on Sheldon, his own concentrated on stopping the room from spinning. Leonard just couldn’t take his eyes off the scene before him. His girlfriend, with her arm around a guy that kissed her last night, like it was perfectly fine. It made him want to yell, not least because that would make Sheldon’s head pound some more.

“I’m sorry, are we not even going to talk about what happened last night?” he asked, perhaps just a little too loudly for anyone’s comfort.

“Leonard, not now,” Penny sighed heavily. “He’s already suffering enough.”

“Oh, so because he’s hungover, I’m supposed to be okay that he kissed my woman!” he asked crossly.

Penny’s eyes went comically wide as she looked up at him.

“Or my girlfriend, the woman I’m dating... beautiful woman, not my woman,” he back-tracked fast, realising his big mistake too late.

Penny just rolled her eyes.

“I’m afraid I have a universal apology to make,” said Sheldon, sounding pained as one hand went to his head again. “Penny, Leonard, Amy,” he said as his girlfriend returned to the room, squinting at each of them since even the moderate levels of light in the apartment seemed far too bright right now. “I apologise for the chaotic behaviour I’ve been exhibiting if it has upset any of you at all. My kissing Penny was...”

He paused in deep thought apparently, or maybe because he was going to puke, nobody could be sure. After almost a full minute with no more words spoken, Penny continued for him.

“It was just one of those wacky things that happened,” she said easily, shrugging her shoulders like it really was no big deal at all. “Y’know, like a drunken mistake.”

“But I wasn’t drunk until I came here and discovered there’s actually no tea in Long Island Iced Tea,” Sheldon was quick to explain.

Yeah, because that was helping!

“You weren’t drunk on booze, sweetie,” said Penny gently. “At least, not when the kissing happened,” she sympathised as he shook and winced through his hangover beside her. “You were on, like, a chaos high. You threw out the rule book and... I don’t know, you felt all liberal.”

“Liberated,” he corrected like a reflex.

“Honestly, Sheldon, I think you exhibited perfectly reasonable behaviour in the circumstances,” said Amy easily. “I mean, just look at her,” she sighed, staring at Penny in a most disconcerting way.

The blonde shifted awkwardly in her seat, making a particular point of not looking in Amy’s direction for the moment. She was highly aware of Leonard’s presence still, standing there with his arms folded across his chest and a face like thunder. He was being so ridiculous about all this, at least that was what she was telling herself right now, just because it was easier than admitting anything else.

“So, we’ll go home now and forget all this craziness ever happened, okay?” she said, mostly to Sheldon, but then to Leonard too.

Her boyfriend shrugged, as if he might acquiesce. Given that Sheldon had apologised and was now suffering quite enough, plus he was most likely to go back to his usual well-ordered self after his ordeal, there was nothing really to fight about anymore. That was almost a disappointing thought, even if Penny didn’t want to think about why she felt that way.

“I’m not sure I’ll ever forget the things I experienced last night,” said Sheldon then, looking over at Penny with such an intensity in his eyes she wasn’t sure how to deal.

Honestly, she really needed to look away, and yet she found she couldn’t quite manage it. Sheldon could be talking about anything he did in his twenty four hours of anarchy, and yet he seemed to be talking specifically about the part that involved her. Kissing her couldn’t have been this great experience for a guy like him. Sure, Penny was a good kisser, she was all aware of that, and Sheldon was a kissing virgin as far as she knew so he had no frame of reference in the first place. Maybe it had meant something to him, maybe, and if that was the case then they had way bigger problems that she ever considered before. Her own feelings for Sheldon were an odd mix of emotions she didn’t much like to think about, but if he liked her too, liked her more than the friend that took him to Disneyland and sang him Soft Kitty when he was sick... Oh, this was bad.

“Well, we... I think right now we should just get you home,” she told Sheldon, patting his knee lightly.

Leonard made an incredulous sound at the very idea of last night being swept under the carpet this way.

“I don’t think...”

“Not the issue right now, Leonard!” Penny snapped at him just as soon as he opened his mouth.

“You don’t even know what I was going to say!” he protested, but the glare she sent his way then proved it didn’t matter.

“After the things you’ve been saying so far tonight, I think it’s safer that I don’t,” she said crossly, trying to keep her voice even so as not to further aggravate Sheldon’s pounding head.

When she looked his way again, she realised Amy was now perched on the arm of the couch by her boyfriend, encouraging water and aspirin into him. Penny smiled.

“Now, Sheldon, let’s get you home, get you feeling better, then I’m going to cut your hair, and all this craziness can end,” she said gently.

Sheldon started at her words, whipping his head around so he could look at her. It was a move he immediately regretted as his head swam violently. The cold water hit his stomach at the same moment, and the consequences were about to be spectacular and horrible. Sheldon ran to the bathroom as fast as he could go, and all three friends watched him leave, wondering who was best to follow. It took all of five seconds for Penny to make the decision that it ought to be her.

Walking slowly from the living room and around the corner to the bathroom, she hovered waiting by the door until the heaving stopped and the toilet was flushed. She went to the half-open door and gave it a tap before letting herself in. Sheldon was huddled on the tiled floor by the tub, looking as little like himself as he ever had.

“You okay, sweetie?” she asked pointlessly, since it was evident he was not.

Sheldon gave no answer to her question, even as she came to crouch beside him and put a careful hand to his arm. He looked at her then as if realising she had entered the room for the first time. Poor guy was so messed up right now.

“Penny,” he said hoarsely, and she waited for something profound, but it wasn’t what she got. “You’re not trained. You’re not licensed. Most importantly, you don’t have access to my haircut records.”

She almost laughed at how unexpected his words were. Despite pelting from the room and puking up his guts, Sheldon was still on the haircut thing, still determined that he had haircut records that must be seen by a professional. After everything they’d been through, as if it really mattered.

“Honey, look, we’ve known each other for a long time now, right?” she said gently, encouraging him to look at her. “You trust me, don’t you? C’mon, after everything we’ve been through together. How much closer do we need to be for you to trust me with a pair of scissors?”

The intensity was back in his eyes as he met her own gaze and Penny swallowed hard. Closer. Maybe she had used the wrong word there. This guy had seen her at her lowest ebb before now. He had also seen her naked. Last night he had pulled her body flush with his and kissed the breath out of her. There wasn’t very much closer for them to be. It was scary and weird to think about, and yet Penny wasn’t sorry for any part of her shared history with Sheldon Cooper, not a second of it.

“Very well,” he said eventually, “Penny, you may take me home, and you may cut my hair,” he told her, allowing her to help him to his feet before he added the one caveat. “When the room stops spinning.”

She tried to reign in a giggle as she helped him back through to the living room. Maybe they were going to be okay after all. Penny just didn’t quite know how yet.


	5. Chapter 5

Penny wasn’t sure what to expect from Sheldon once he got through his hangover. The ride back home in the car was mostly silent, punctuated only by having to pull over twice for Sheldon to heave some more. Penny felt so sorry for the guy. She and Leonard put him to bed, and before another fight could start, she went back to her own place, telling her so-called boyfriend that he better take care of Sheldon or else. She couldn’t imagine that he would be anything but the good guy for at least as long as his room-mate was suffering. In the meantime, it seemed best just to stay out of the way until one of them came looking for her.

It wasn’t long before Penny was called on. The regular rhythmic knocking of Sheldon on her door was maybe just a little more subdued than usual. He looked better, and he should since it was almost two days since his night of chaos, something wasn’t quite right though. Penny was going to ask him what was wrong, but didn’t get a chance. He announced he was here for his hair cut, as promised, and hoped it was a convenient time. The thoughtfulness wasn’t entirely new, at least not where Penny was concerned, and she smiled as she told him it was fine.

Concentrating on the task at hand was easier and harder all at the same time. There were a hundred things in Penny’s head she felt she ought to say and yet none of them were all that willing to be heard. She put all her focus on giving Sheldon a decent haircut, trying not to think about anything else. It didn’t come easy when she could hear him breathing, sighing as her fingers ran through his hair...

When finally she was done, she searched for the hand mirror to let him see her work, and made a big deal of cleaning up, as if she had no time to talk or do anything else. 

“Thank you,” said Sheldon, polite and proper, as he smiled at his reflection in the glass.

Penny let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. She didn’t know what else she expected him to say. He could’ve complained about his haircut but she didn’t see how. Of course, where Sheldon was concerned, she often didn’t see his comments coming. Maybe now the anarchy and chaos was over, she’d stand a slightly better chance, but Penny doubted it somehow.

“So, that’s it now, right?” she asked, helping him take off the towel he’d been wearing as a cape. “Back to our regularly scheduled Sheldon?”

He looked overly thoughtful when he got up from the stool and turned to glance her way. Penny braced herself, but wasn’t sure what she was expecting, if anything at all.

“I don’t know,” he said, with no lack of serious consideration. “Certainly, there were advantages to a planned and regimented life,” he told her, scientific as ever, “but, the effects of alcohol aside, there was also something freeing and pleasant about living in anarchy, no rules to hold me back.”

Penny swallowed hard as his gaze met hers and stuck her to the spot. This could not be good.

“Well, sure,” she forced out eventually, digging up a smile from somewhere and hoping it didn’t look too delirious - she was starting to feel as if she was going kind of crazy. “I mean, you got to play the bongos, who wouldn’t love that?” she half-joked, before turning away.

“Penny?”

Sheldon’s hand closing around her wrist was more of a shock than him saying her name. He didn’t touch, not as a rule. Penny couldn’t help but listen when the little voice in the back of her head reminded her that actually he did, and usually it was her he reached for. She got all the hugs, the friendly pats on the shoulder, all of that. Then the same voice threw their little kissing scene from last night into her mind's eye. Penny felt an involuntary shiver pass through her.

“What is it, sweetie?” she asked, trying for normal and cheery, failing miserably, especially when Sheldon spoke again.

“I’m not sorry,” he told her, getting Penny’s attention in an instant, her eyes shooting up to meet his own intense gaze again. “I know I should be. The rules of society and friendship dictate that I should have thought of Leonard’s feelings, and the Relationship Agreement I have with Amy ought to over-ride everything else, of course, though I believe the mantra is ‘bros before hoes’,” he rattled out, the way only Sheldon could, and Penny couldn’t help but smile. “Whilst I mean no disrespect to Amy or to you by using the gangster vernacular...”

“I know,” she interrupted without thinking. “I, er... It’s fine,” she continued then, shaking her head and pulling her arm from his grasp then, because this was too weird and one of them was just going to have to back off already. “You were living without rules. Any woman who got in your way was going to seem like the perfect candidate for kissing.”

She shrugged it off like it was nothing, trying to convince herself she was nuts more than anything else. Sheldon did not have feelings for her and, apart from their oddball friendship, she didn’t have feelings for him either. Penny hated that she was silently arguing with herself right now, especially when Sheldon decided to start arguing with her too!

“Not true, Penny,” he insisted, following her all the way to her bedroom where she had taken the towel to the laundry basket. “The truth is, I have never really given in to my base urges. As the first and only true example of homo novus, I was half convinced I didn’t have the capacity for them,” he said thoughtfully. “You, Penny, appear to be the exception to the rule.”

“I’m the...?” she began turning around and finding him that much closer than she ever expected. “Okay, weirdest compliment ever,” she forced out, even as she looked up and found his eyes looking down into her own.

“It wasn’t really supposed to be a compliment, though I can see why your singular position may seem to be a reason for congratulations... I’m getting off topic,” he waved a hand and shook his head in unison as he got back on track. “In short, I don’t think I will ever be sorry I kissed you,” he said too softly, and Penny was pretty sure she forget to breathe when he did so. “As I said, even though I know social rules and protocols ought to have forbidden it, I’m not sorry.”

I’m not sorry either. Penny opened her mouth to say the words but managed to control herself at the last. She couldn’t say that, not to Sheldon. Kissing him back had been wrong, she was dating Leonard. She loved Leonard... didn’t she?

“Um, well, you were breaking all the rules," she forced out eventually. “So, it makes sense, I guess.”

“Indeed,” Sheldon nodded once, his hands clapping together in front of himself and then behind his back instead as he shifted his feet a little. “I suppose now my next decision must be if all the rules are once again to be adhered to or not. Do you have an opinion?” he asked Penny curiously.

“I-I don’t know,” she admitted honestly. “I mean, everyone needs some rules sometimes. Anarchy and chaos can be dangerous...”

“Agreed,” he nodded again.

“But I guess, it’s totally possible to be too organised and...” she started to flounder as her eyes filtered from Sheldon to the bed and back.

Oh God, what am I thinking?! Penny felt like she had no control, like she was the crazy one in the room, and given Sheldon’s great level of wacky, that was really saying something. She couldn’t seriously be considering telling Sheldon to throw away the rule book permanently and kiss her again, could she? Was she seriously wondering what it would be like if she could really make him give up all his disciplined behaviour and complex neuroses, just throw her on the bed and make love to her like a real man?

“Sheldon,” she said, his name coming out in an odd wobbly way that she hoped he didn’t ask her to explain. “I think you need to go home and figure this one out for yourself,” she told him, after one very deep breath and a very hard swallow.

He just stared at her for a moment, clearly bemused by her tone, or maybe even the fact she was blushing, because Penny was pretty sure she was, however uncharacteristic that seemed.

“Very well,” he said eventually. “Thank you again... for the haircut,” he told her as he turned to leave.

“No problem!” Penny called behind Sheldon as he walked out of her room and then the apartment, the door thudding shut in his wake.

She stood still just staring for a minute or more after he left. One hand shot up to her forehead then, shock registering on her face as she replayed the conversation they just had. Her and Sheldon, they were friends these days, really good friends sometimes. Sometimes he drove her nuts, but then Penny understood she could make him just as crazy, often without even trying. When it came to the crunch they were there for each other, and she would always count him amongst her closest friends, whether she was willing to admit it outloud or not. Everything changed when he kissed her last night, setting off a chain reaction of thoughts and emotions Penny could never have pre-empted. She was suddenly looking at Sheldon Cooper in a completely new way, and honestly, he was looking pretty good.

“What the hell is wrong with me?” she muttered, sinking down to sit on the edge of the bed.

Penny had no good answer to give herself to that one.

* * *

“You let Penny cut your hair,” Leonard stated pointlessly as Sheldon returned to their apartment.

“I did,” he agreed. “Honestly? It’s a little Hollywood, but I think I can pull it off,” he shugged, heading straight through the living room towards the kitchen.

He stopped short of reaching for a cup to make tea, turning back to look at his friend sat at the desk. There was a conversation he needed to have here, with someone who might be able to give a little insight. Leonard was usually a reasonable source of information when it came to dating. After all, he had a limited but fair amount of experience in the area, certainly more than Sheldon himself. Still, things had felt strained between the two of them since the rules were broken two days ago. Leonard was upset about Sheldon’s kissing Penny, and he did understand that, but as he told the blonde herself, he couldn’t be sorry for his actions, not honestly.

“Leonard?” he tried, managing to get his friend’s attention, even if he did look a little irritated by the interruption. “May I offer you a hot beverage?”

Honestly, Leonard wanted to say yes, but didn’t think he should. He was still pretty mad at Sheldon for what happened before with Penny. At the same time, it was hard to blame a guy that barely understood the rules of society and brotherhood that he was breaking. It was unlikely anything of that kind would ever happen again. It seemed silly to hold onto a grudge that wouldn’t benefit anyone. He sighed.

“Sure, I’ll take a coffee please,” he replied politely.

Sheldon smiled and set to making the drinks, a coffee for Leonard, a herbal tea for himself. Leonard had expected that to be the end of their brief conversation, but apparently that was wishful thinking.

“I’ve come to a conclusion,” said Sheldon as he busied himself with the drinks. “It has taken some fairly serious thought. Having considered my life changes, my relationships, the rules I live my life by, I can’t say that I have completely made a solid decision on every aspect going forward,” he considered, tossing his tea bag into the trash. “However, I have come to this one conclusion - that I must terminate my boyfriend-girlfriend agreement with Amy Farrah-Fowler.”

That certainly got Leonard’s attention. His eyebrows shot up so far that Sheldon would’ve expected them to disappear entirely into his friend’s hairline if he didn’t know that was a physical impossibility.

“You’re breaking up with Amy?” he gasped aloud.

“Isn’t that what I just said?” Sheldon rolled his eyes. “I am not in a position where I intend to cut her out of my life completely. Amy is a good friend, she is respectful and intelligent enough to be of interest and of use to me,” he explained, in the way that only Sheldon could. “However, there are aspects of our established relationship agreement that I am not willing to honour, and I wouldn't expect her to keep to her side of the bargain when I cannot.”

Leonard opened his mouth to answer and then closed it fast. He would like to say Sheldon was being crazy, but that was often true. Unfortunately, on this occasion, he was actually making a weird kind of sense. A person was quite at liberty to break up with another person if they weren’t happy in the relationship, and there was just no arguing with the facts. Sheldon didn’t treat Amy like a girlfriend anyway. They went on dates, but there was no physical contact, barely even a compliment that passed from him to her. She was interested, maybe even infatuated, but he wasn’t. 

“Thank you,” said Leonard eventually as Sheldon handed him his coffee. “So, you’re going back to the single life?” he checked with his friend, turning around on his swivel chair to follow Sheldon’s movement to the couch and his usual spot.

“I suppose if that is the terminology you wish to use then, yes, I am,” his friend confirmed.

“And you’re going back to being you?” he asked next, expanding on his badly phrased sentence when Sheldon made a face at him for faulty grammar. “What I mean is, you’re reverting to your previous state of being, complete with rules, sleep patterns, bathroom schedule, and your job at the university?” 

“Yes and no,” his friend said with a look of deep consideration. “I’m not so sure that going back to what I was is an option anymore, Leonard,” he explained. “My experiment in chaos certainly taught me a few lessons, for example, that my body is not well-quipped to handle a high level of alcohol intake, or a lack of sleep,” he said seriously. “However, there may yet be things that I could afford to change, that I may in fact find I am better off for having changed.”

With that he picked up his tea and headed off to his room, without another word or even a glance back at his room-mate. Leonard sat staring for a long moment, wondering what these things were that Sheldon wanted to change. His gaze shifted as he moved around on his chair and looked towards the front door. He thought of Penny across the hall. She was his girlfriend again, at least for now. Somehow he wondered how long it could really last. He always thought that way, wondering how long before she left him again, for someone better. This was the first and only time he ever wondered how long it might be before she left him for Sheldon.


	6. Chapter 6

Amy felt like she had sort of seen this coming in one way, and yet in another it was kind of a shock. It had been hard enough to believe when a guy like Sheldon wanted to be a boyfriend, or perhaps the more accurate terminology was that he acquiesced to be her boyfriend. Amy wasn’t sure Sheldon ever wanted to do anything that didn’t involve comic books, computer games, or physics. Still, he had entered into their special boyfriend-girlfriend agreement, and Amy had started to think maybe he really was going to commit to her, that someday they would be closer than friends with hardly any benefits. Now those hopes were being completely dashed, and yes, she had to admit, she kind of always assumed this day would come.

“I am sorry if I am causing you pain with the termination of this contract,” said Sheldon, shuffling papers across the table to her. “Unfortunately, the situation is unavoidable given the new circumstances.”

Amy wondered about these circumstances he mentioned. So far, Sheldon had been kind of vague on what the changes to his life had been. Naturally she knew it probably had to do with his anarchist escapades a few nights ago. Things were different now, he was different, in the slightest of ways but she could tell. You didn’t study brain activity and have a degree in neuroscience without being able to tell that your boyfriend was thinking differently these days.

“There is no longer room in your life for a girlfriend,” she said, a statement of what she believed to be true rather than questioning him.

“Not at the present time,” agreed Sheldon. “Although I cannot make any guarantees that I won’t in time decide to take on another girlfriend, be it under a similar agreement to ours, or something wholly different... That is specified on page three of the termination document,” he showed her with his pointer finger.

“Understood,” Amy nodded once, reading through the final paragraphs she had yet to cover.

There was a question she did want to ask. It was there on the tip of her tongue just waiting to be spoken. She figured she may as well let it out, after all, no amount of pissing off Sheldon was going to make any difference now. They were breaking up, come what may.

“One thing I have to know,” she said eventually, making herself meet his eyes. “Does the termination of our relationship agreement have anything to do with a certain bestie of mine that lives across the hall from you, vis-à-vis the beautiful blonde we all call Penny?”

Sheldon’s eyes went almost imperceptibly wider at the question but were back to normal again in a second. Amy knew she was right before he ever opened his mouth to answer her verbally.

“It would be wrong of me to pretend that Penny is not a factor in my life or my decision making on this occasion,” he admitted. “As you know, she and I did share a kiss, and that does constitute a breach of the agreement that you and I shared,” he continued, looking oddly uncomfortable. “Whilst I am sure you could forgive me such an indiscretion, I’m afraid I am not in a position to be what the olde English would call a cad or a bounder,” he said definitely. “Therefore, the only possible way forward is for me to release you, Amy Farrah-Fowler, from our agreement.”

“That’s very noble, Sheldon,” she thanked him graciously. “But doesn’t it count for something that I don’t really mind that you kissed Penny? Or that given the opportunity, I probably would have behaved exactly as you did?”

It was an odd admission, at least Sheldon thought so. His girlfriend, for that was what she still was officially until the paperwork was signed, seemed inordinately fascinated by Penny, not just as a friend to look up to, but in some kind of sexual way too. Of course Sheldon understood that some women were attracted to their fellow sex rather than the opposite gender, but Amy was supposed to be attracted to him too, and he and Penny were hardly two of a kind that way.

“Amy,” he said eventually. “I’m afraid there is no way to make our past arrangement work under the new circumstances I find myself in. Termination of our contract if the only way forward. I’m sorry if this upsets you.”

“I understand,” she nodded once, signing her name on the documents he placed before her. “There, all done,” she smiled slightly. “The end of an era.”

“Really, Amy,” he rolled his eyes. “I don’t think a little over three months quite constitutes an era. Nevertheless, the end of a part of my life that has been relatively enjoyable and useful on occasions, certainly deserves a moment for reflection.”

He was silent for all of three seconds, before speaking again.

“And we’re done,” he declared, signing his name to the paperwork and giving Amy her own carbon copy.

It seemed very clinical and business-like. Amy shouldn’t be disappointed, after all, the beginning of their relationship had been no more romantic or special than this moment either. Sheldon was a singular man and she cared for him very much. She had so wanted to be his girlfriend and yet there was a strange numbness that came with the break up. Amy expected to feel more, but she didn’t.

For Sheldon’s part, he felt very little about any of this. The fact of the matter was he refused to be the kind of man that strung a good woman along. Amy was a decent person, a friend that he much admired and respected, but to keep her in the role of his girlfriend given recent revelations would have proven impossible. That did not mean he planned on signing this type of agreement with anyone else any time soon, but he did have some thoughts about Penny that just wouldn’t quit.

“Now, I wonder if it would be acceptable for me to ask your advice about something,” he said, urging to Amy just as soon as he had filed away his paperwork. “We are still friends, are we not?”

“Of course, always,” Amy assured him.

“I was wondering if you could assist me using your knowledge of behavioural science,” he explained. “I am a little concerned that I may have been experiencing some kind of chemical imbalance of late, causing erratic behaviour. The urge to kiss Penny for example, that is not like me at all.”

Amy opened her mouth to speak but then closed it again fast. She had an explanation for Sheldon and Penny. In the back of her mind she had always suspected that something existed there, some kind of deeper feeling, but she dismissed it out of hand because Penny was with Leonard (at least in an on-again, off-again way) and Sheldon had entered into an agreement with herself. Now things were different, now her suspicions didn’t seem so crazy.

“Sheldon, did you ever consider that, rather than an imbalance of chemicals in the brain, perhaps it is much baser instincts attracting you to Penny?” she asked him. “Perhaps you are not thinking with the brain in your head on this one,” she tried, eyes drifting very definitely south of Sheldon’s border.

He realised what she was implying and reacted as if he had just received an electric shock, spasming with the impact of a charge.

“Amy!” he gasped. “I am homo novus, far evolved beyond reacting to such base urges the kind of which you speak of,” he told her plainly. “Of course I have noticed that Penny is an attractive woman. It would be an odd specimen of the human race, be they male or female, who did not notice, but that does not mean I have lost all control over my behaviour based on her looks alone!”

“Okay,” Amy considered, not really knowing how to argue with him right now.

Sheldon refused to believe he could be a normal human male, that he could exhibit signs of attraction, lust, or love. Certainly he never seemed to have any real kind of deep feeling for Amy herself, but for Penny? Something was different with her. It always had been. It wasn’t that Amy couldn’t understand why or that she was really jealous, she just didn’t know how she, or anyone else for that matter, was ever going to make Sheldon see the truth that he refused to acknowledge.

“Consider this,” she said eventually. “If Darwin's theories are correct, and man is an evolution of apes, then a standard homo erectus should exhibit mostly advanced behaviours, more self-control and intelligence than our friends the Australopithecus. However, on occasion, those same specimens of man can show traits of his ape brothers. This being true, is it so ridiculous to theorise that in certain circumstances in which base feelings are present, such as in pursuit of food or attraction to the opposing gender, homo novus might not occasionally be prone to acting more like the lesser being he has evolved from?”

“Huh,” said Sheldon then, head tilting to one side as he thought over what Amy just said.

She made an interesting point that could not really be denied. He did indeed still require certain aspects of life that lesser beings enjoyed. He needed food and water, cared for his mother, required the use of a bathroom. Of all his shared traits with man, it was not so crazy to think it was possible for him to be attracted to a woman, it was only that it had never really happened before now.

Sheldon did turn to Penny in times of need, in joy and sadness, in all kinds of circumstances. He had admitted to himself that she was the exception to the rule when it came to his feelings for women. Never had he been so attracted to another person before as he was to her. Never before had he wondered what it would be like to experience those physical and emotional moments that couples knew. Amy had perhaps pointed out to him what he should already know, and without question she had given him a great deal to think about.

* * *

“Where’s Sheldon tonight?” asked Penny as she settled into her seat, opening up the box of Chinese take-out.

“Leonard said something about him going to see Amy,” replied Howard from his place in the middle of the couch.

Raj leant over and whispered in his best friend’s ear, and Penny watched Wolowitz react with shock.

“Really? Wow, he really has gone extra whack-a-doodle these last couple of days,” he shook his head, before looking to Penny. “Raj says he saw Sheldon on the way over and he told him he was going to break up with Amy.”

Penny wasn’t sure what she was supposed to say to that. Her hands stilled on the food container, her eyes staring at a non-existent spot in the distance. She felt bad for Amy in a way, and yet she never really did expect things to last between her and Sheldon. The girl was inexperienced but she so wanted a man to be her boyfriend, in all the senses of the word. Penny couldn’t ever see Sheldon giving into her, not physically or even emotionally. Penny would have suspected he would never be that close to anyone, until he started showing signs of attraction to her. She shook her head. Sheldon wasn’t attracted to her, that was crazy. Sure, he kissed her and he said he didn’t regret it, but that didn’t mean anything. Sheldon was always saying wacky things that sounded like one thing but meant something else entirely in reality.

“You okay?” asked Leonard as he came to take his seat.

“Yeah, sure,” she forced a smile, and yet they both knew it was fake.

Even Howard and Raj were not so oblivious that they couldn't see the weird vibe in the air between Penny and Leonard, though neither was overly keen to bring it up. The four sat in silence for too long, all of them suddenly wishing Sheldon were present. In moments like these he would start babbling about inane topics that interested no-one but at least it was background noise, so much better than this increasingly uncomfortable silence.

“So, kinda sad about Amy and Sheldon,” said Leonard eventually.

Penny visibly flinched at the sound of those words and didn't quite cover it well enough for the others not to notice.

“Yeah, it is,” she said, clearing her throat just so she could get those words out.

“Do we know exactly why he's ending things with her?” asked Howard carefully.

There was something going on that he and Raj had clearly missed. He wanted to know what it was but at the same time incurring the wrath of an angry Penny was never worth the effort, he knew that from past experience.

“I guess he just decided they weren't compatible,” she told him, eyes always on her food, at least until Leonard gave a derisive snort that got everyone's attention. “What was that for?” asked Penny.

“Nothing,” he shrugged, even though it was clearly something. “I just think there are some strange coincidences going on lately, ever since Sheldon decided that the regimented lifestyle we're accustomed to him having no longer applies.”

Raj leant over to whisper something to Howard even as Penny turned a steely gave on her boyfriend.

“I honestly don't know and I'm not comfortable asking,” muttered Wolowitz to his friend.

“You guys wanna know what happened?” asked Penny then, slamming her food container down onto the table. “'Cause I'll tell you, save on all the confusion and the petty snide comments,” she said pointedly at Leonard. “When Sheldon decided to let loose and not play by any rules anymore, he kissed me. It didn’t mean anything it was no big deal, but Leonard would like to play pretend that some great affair is going on or whatever other crazy story he has made up in his head. Well get over it, Leonard!” she told him, in full force and volume. “Just get over yourself!”

She stormed out then, the door slamming in her wake. Raj looked at Howard and his friend stared back. Leonard continued eating like nothing had even happened. The silence returned and was not broken for a good long while.


	7. Chapter 7

Things had been awkward for a few days now. Leonard was being pretty short with Sheldon, though he was speaking to him in general. Penny had apologised for storming out of the apartment and Leonard had agreed maybe he was being a little snotty. They had effectively patched things up and yet still an atmosphere remained. Neither of them seemed willing to say their relationship was all but over, they each were just waiting for the other to make the decision.

This weekend marked the occasion when the new Star Wars online game was released. It was a joint decision between Wolowitz and Koothrapali that maybe all the guys spending the weekend together playing said game might rebuild some bridges, get thing back on an even keel. When they pitched their idea to the Leonard and Sheldon, both were eager to agree. They had nowhere else to be and nothing else specific to do. It would be like the old days, before any of them had girlfriends. They could just be slobs, eat junk food, and kick virtual butt. The idea certainly appealed.

Bernadette took the news well, she had no problem with her Howie spending time with the boys now and then. It gave her a little peace and quiet to herself after all. Leonard almost didn’t even bother telling Penny about the plans for gaming the weekend away. Somehow he didn’t really think she would care, and yet knew she would make it all his thoughtless fault if he didn’t at least tell her what was going on. He went over and knocked on her door.

“Hey,” she smiled - he knew it was forced.

“Hi,” he replied. “I, er... I just wanted to let you know I’m not gonna be around this weekend. Well, when I say not around, me and the guys are going to be hanging out in the apartment, playing the new Star Wars online game.”

“Oh, okay. That’s cool,” Penny nodded her understanding, shifting awkwardly in place against the door jamb.

This was so weird and just awful. A voice in her head screamed that she should break up with Leonard already. It wasn’t working. It had never worked, not really and truly. They got along in a friends sort of way and she wasn’t repulsed by him in the bedroom or anything, but it wasn’t exactly a great romance or anything. Lately, after the kiss with Sheldon, Leonard had just proven more and more how much he didn’t really trust her, and that hurt too. Penny knew most of the problem was his own inferiority complex when it came to women, but it didn’t help. He was still making her feel like the bad person here, and honestly, Penny had to wonder if she wasn’t a little bit bad for staying with him when she knew she didn’t have the feelings she should for her boyfriend.

“Um, I gotta go. Work,” she said then, hiking a thumb over her shoulder back into the apartment.

Leonard nodded that he understood, lingered a moment, and then turned to walk away. Penny didn’t even bother to watch him go, just ducked back into her own apartment and closed the door. She should have told him, she should have just said it wasn’t working and they were over, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. She had reasons, two of them in fact. The first was the one that made her feel bad, the part where she wanted to stay with Leonard just so she could say she had a boyfriend, just so she wasn’t completely alone. The second was Sheldon. If she dumped Leonard now it as like admitting that kissing his best friend had made a difference, that maybe she preferred him or planned to move on from one guy to the other. That didn’t suit Penny at all, even though she had vaguely considered the possibility, thought about what it might be like if she dated Sheldon.

Checking her watch, Penny found it was only ten in the morning, and too early for a drink. She also knew she couldn’t actually distract herself with work yet either. She had lied about needing to get there already.

“Damn it!” she cursed, 

Slamming herself down into the couch cushions and flipping on the TV. She needed something to distract her, to stop her thinking about boys.

It was like being a teenager again, and Penny couldn’t deal with that. She was a grown woman with a mind of her own, she could do what she wanted. The guys were doing what they wanted this weekend, playing their online game and hanging out. Maybe Penny should just do exactly what she wanted and screw all of them. If only she knew what it was she really wanted, Penny could see her life getting an awful lot simpler. The trouble was she didn’t know, and wondered if and when she ever would.

* * *

Amy felt awkward and strange as she reached the fourth floor of 2311 N. Los Robles. Behind one door was her ex-boyfriend Sheldon and his buddies playing a Star Wars game, or so she had heard from Bernadette. Behind the other was her bestie, Penny, whom she had actually come to see. She hoped they were still friends, but at this point, she just wasn’t so sure. That was why she was here. Amy wasn’t sure how things were going to be now she and Sheldon were no longer together. She assumed his friends were still her friends if she wanted them, since Sheldon had not said otherwise. In fact, he had assured her that their friendship could easily remain intact if that was what she wished. Amy did want that, at least she thought she did. It really wasn’t taking as long to get over Sheldon as she thought it might. In part she wondered how much she really wanted Dr Cooper specifically and how much she just liked the concept of having a man in her life.

Rapping on Penny’s door, Amy waited just a minute before her friend answered.

“Amy, hi,” she said awkwardly. “Um, did you wanna come inside or...?”

“Yes, thank you,” she nodded, following on into the apartment.

The two women hovered a moment and then suddenly turned to face each other, apologising in unison.

“Why are you sorry?” asked Penny curiously.

“Because I haven’t come to see you sooner,” said Amy as if it ought to be obvious, sitting down on the couch when her friend gestured that she should. “My break up with Sheldon, which I’m sure you are aware of, should have had no impact on our friendship, and yet it has been several days and I have not contacted you,” she explained. “You must have thought I was deliberately avoiding you, which to my mind is simply unforgivable, when you are and always will be such an honoured friend of mine. My bestie.”

Her smile was always too big when she used that term and it concerned Penny somewhat to notice it. Honestly, she was kind of relieved to hear that Amy wasn’t mad at her. She knew for sure that Amy was aware of the kiss that occurred between her and Sheldon. Penny was pretty sure she had played a part in bringing about this break up, albeit she hadn’t meant to do it, and perhaps it was a little big headed to suspect she had been one of the reasons.

“Well, I’m glad we’re still friends, Amy, you know that,” she smiled back at her. “But I’m a little surprised. I mean, what happened with Sheldon and me...”

“Oh, that doesn’t matter to me,” Amy literally waved away Penny’s concern with her hand. “It’s perfectly natural for two beautiful people to be attracted to each other. I can forgive you as easily as I forgave Sheldon. I’m sure in your position or in his I would have acted in exactly the same way.”�“That’s very noble, Amy, but...” Penny stopped talking when she realised the exact words her friend had said.

Penny shook her head and let it go. Right now there were more important things to be dealt with here.

“Um, the thing is, I just need you to know that I never encouraged Sheldon to break up with you,” she explained. “I thought you were great together, and when he kissed me... well, I can’t deny that I might’ve participated a little, but it wasn’t supposed to mean anything.”

Amy smiled a strange smile that Penny couldn’t make out at all before she replied.

“Have you ever known Sheldon to do anything at all that meant absolutely nothing?”

Penny opened her mouth to answer that and ended up looking like a landed fish when no sound came out on any of three attempts. The correct response to the question was ‘no’ but that just made everything even more confusing.

* * *

Sheldon wasn’t sure what he was doing. It was a strange experience to realise he was acting on instinct alone, with no rhyme or reason that he could calculate or identify. When the guys decided they needed a break from the Star Wars online game to allow for bathroom trips, food selection, and in Howard’s case a call to his fiancé, Sheldon only had one place he wanted to go. Nobody questioned his hasty exit and now here he was, outside of Penny’s door.

Quietly he knocked three times, called her name, and repeated in his usual pattern. She was smiling when she opened the door and faced him, that smile that had never failed to do something inside of Sheldon that he didn’t have a word or scientific explanation for.

“Hey,” she greeted him. “I thought you and the guys were gaming all weekend?”

“Oh, we are, but this is a standardised and accounted for fifteen minute comfort break,” he explained. “Raj is ordering food, Leonard is emptying his bladder, and Howard is calling Bernadette.”

“And you’re here,” said Penny pointlessly, wondering why she had bothered just as soon as the words were out of her mouth. “Y’know you just missed Amy. She came to talk to me about... well, your break up actually.”

“Ah, yes,” Sheldon nodded. “I hope her heart is mending admirably well.”

Penny bit her lip. Sometimes he was so sweet, even when what he was saying seemed ridiculous. Amy and Sheldon were never really in love, she was sure of it. They certainly showed no real signs, not that Penny was an expert in the field. Sometimes she wondered if she really knew what love was herself, the real kind that could exist between two people who were attracted to each other’s mind, body, and soul. It seemed insane to be looking at Sheldon and thinking about these things, and yet completely appropriate at the same time.

“Sheldon, you didn’t dump Amy because... well, because...?”

She couldn’t get the question out there, she just couldn’t. Penny felt too stupid asking if she was the reason, afraid perhaps that Sheldon would laugh and tell her how preposterous such an explanation would really be. Maybe she feared rejection as much as people like Leonard or Amy, she was just better at covering it up.

“Penny,” he said too seriously. “I ended my agreement with Amy Farrah-Fowler because I had broken one of it’s rules, and because I no longer felt able to uphold my side of the contacts restrictions. To be faithful to Amy would be impossible when I have yet to decide how my life is going to be moving forward.”

“Uh-huh,” Penny nodded her understanding, even though that very thing was lacking slightly.

Her mind had got stuck around the words ‘to be faithful would be impossible’. She supposed in a sense he had been unfaithful when he kissed her. If you’re dating one person and lay your lips on another that way, it was considered bad, cheating even. Between what Sheldon seemed to be implying and what Amy had already told her today, Penny’s head was spinning. Every piece of evidence pointed towards Sheldon liking her, having a crush on her or something. The scarier part was that Penny was finding she really didn’t mind, that maybe she felt the same.

“Penny,” he said then, stepping in closer.

The only way she could reply was in a whispered tone that did not belong in a public hallway.

“Sheldon...”

Penny didn’t know what was happening to her, how suddenly she couldn’t be close to this guy without thinking about that kiss from before, without wondering if it could feel as good a second time.

“I have an experiment in mind that I need your help with,” said Sheldon, sounding almost nervous if that were possible.

The truth of the matter was, this did make him uneasy. Of all the mathematical and scientific principals he had tested, the theories he had extrapolated, this was the oddest test he had ever undertaken, and yet he knew it must be done. He could hardly concentrate on anything but thoughts of completing this particular line of research, such he explained to Penny. She nodded along like she understood, but Sheldon doubted she could ever guess what he was really suggesting.

“You agree to be a participant in this experiment?” he checked.

“Sure, I guess” she agreed. “What...?”

The question was left unspoken, but not unanswered as Sheldon’s arms slid around Penny’s body and his lips landed on her own. It had to be some dream that she was going to wake up from any second, that was what Penny assumed. She had several lately, though she never told a soul and wondered at her own sanity because of them. All her thoughts were overpowered then when she realised this really felt good, as good as she remembered and better. The second she realised the moment was about to end, her hands reached out to grab onto Sheldon and make sure he went nowhere. Her fingers in his hair, she kept him in the moment, deepening the kiss he had initiated. The both of them were so completely distracted by their experiment, they didn’t even hear the door to the guys’ apartment open. They didn’t know that not just Leonard, but also Howard and Raj were now audience to their impromptu make out. At least not until Raj let out an undignified squeak of shock.

Penny gasped in a breath, finally letting go of Sheldon. He stepped away from her, apparently as stunned as she felt, though she barely noticed. Penny stared across at Leonard and the look of pain in his eyes. This time there was no fixing what they had before. It was over, it just had to be.


	8. Chapter 8

Penny felt sick. As if it wasn’t bad enough that her relationship with Leonard was falling apart in her hands, now she had been caught cheating on him. Sure, it was only a kiss, but that was cheating, technically speaking. Besides, there was such a thing as emotionally cheating and that Penny knew she had been doing for a while now.

“Okay, damage control,” she muttered as she looked down the line of stated faces across the hall. “Er, we were just...”

“Performing an experiment,” Sheldon finished for her, succinct and to the point as ever.

She could have hugged him and hit him all at once.

“Um, what he means is,” she said, fingers lacing and unlacing, weight shifting from one foot to the other. “Well, what he says, actually. We were just... experimenting.”

It sounded so lame, even though it was the truth, in one sense at least. Sheldon had asked her if she would be a willing participant in testing a theory. Penny had agreed, even though she was pretty sure she knew what was coming and how wrong it was. Calling it an experiment didn’t make it okay. Nothing made it okay to participate in such a heart stopping, toe curling kiss when you were supposed to be dating somebody else.

“Am I just supposed to put up with this?” asked Leonard crossly, arms folded across his chest.

Penny had at least a little respect for the guy for asking the question. The worst of it was, if she played this right, she knew damn well she could have Leonard back around her little finger before the day was done. She could make excuses, play nice, take him into her bed and all would be forgiven. She had that power, but someone once told her that with great power came great responsibility. Penny was pretty sure it was Sheldon that said it, a quote from a comic book perhaps. The point was, she couldn't abuse Leonard like that, she didn’t want to. She didn’t want him back either. Maybe this moment had been a blessing in disguise, though she had also maybe been giving it a little too much thought before she answered.

“Penny?”

“Leonard, I’m sorry,” she said, when prompted to give a response. “I didn’t mean for this to happen, for you to walk out here and see this,” she shook her head sadly.

“How long have you two been doing this behind my back?” her boyfriend asked flatly.

Howard and Raj let their eyes fly back and forth across this ping pong match. Sheldon wasn’t going to just stand by. He stepped towards Leonard with a purpose.

“If I may...”

“You may not!” Leonard snapped, eyes still trained on Penny even as he held up a hand to tell Sheldon to halt already. “Penny, how long?”

“Leonard, it’s not like that,” she promised him. “Me and Sheldon, we... we haven’t really done anything. You were there the first time he kissed me, and this is the second time, that’s it. There hasn’t been anything else, at least not physically.”

“What does that mean?!” her boyfriend asked sharply.

Sheldon turned quickly to look at Penny with the same confused expression that Leonard wore. This was ridiculous. Having such an important conversation that she really wasn’t ready for across a public hallway and with an audience no less. Penny couldn’t handle it. The urge to run and hide was so strong and yet she couldn’t just walk away from this mess, it was of her own doing in so many ways.

“Um, okay, let’s go inside,” she said then, opening her apartment door and encouraging Leonard to follow her.

He did so, giving Sheldon a shove with his shoulder as he went by. Howard and Raj tried to follow Leonard but Penny gave them a death glare than sent them hurrying back the other way. They disappeared into the other apartment, leaving just Sheldon hovering in the hallway.

For a man with such a high IQ, he had never been so confused in the whole of his life. When he asked Penny to take part in an experiment, he meant it. In his mind, it had genuinely been a means to an end. He had a theory he needed to put to the test. The results were pretty darn conclusive, which ought to be a good thing, and yet there were more variables to be considered than had been covered by the initial testing. He needed more data, more time, and someone who understood these particular circumstances much better than he did himself. Penny ought to be the person he turned to in such a predicament, but with her being such a large part of the problem, he doubted she could assist with the solution as she so often had before. Then there was Leonard to consider.

“Too many variables,” he muttered, turning towards his own closed apartment door.

“Sheldon?” Penny called from her own entranceway, making him look back over her shoulder. “C’mon. We’re all involved in this,” she told him with half a smile.

He nodded his understanding and dutifully followed on into her apartment where Leonard waited. The little guy was still wearing his angry expression, body language suggesting he was about to explode with anger at any moment. Sheldon would like to say he fully understood his emotions, but he couldn’t lie like that. It was hard enough for Sheldon to accept that firstly he was having some very strong feelings of his own, and secondly what he was ever supposed to do about them.

“So, you going to explain this to me now?” asked Leonard crossly.

“I really wish I could,” Penny sighed, pushing her hair back off her face. “Leonard, I’m just... I’m so sorry,” she shook her head sadly. “But you and me, it... it doesn’t really work. It can’t.”

He watched her the whole time she was speaking, but then his eyes started flicking to Sheldon. His so-called friend was stood the other side of Penny, his expression entirely blank and his posture screaming defeat. Any other guy and Leonard would have been sure he was being screwed over, that these people were cheating, lying, and laughing behind his back. The fact of the matter was, for all that Sheldon could be a real pain in the ass, he wasn’t this guy. He wasn’t the friend you had to watch because he might steal your girlfriend the minute your back was turned. He never had a serious relationship with any woman, not until Amy, and though she had been his girlfriend for a couple of months, they had never really done anything that Sheldon didn’t do with any other regular friend.

“It doesn’t work with me and you” he echoed Penny’s words without questioning or confirming them, just repeating them as if they would make more sense the second time. “But you think, what? That you and Sheldon would be just be great together?”

Leonard was hoping at least Sheldon would deny it. Usually such questions that suggested him being involved with any woman in any kind of way was met with derisive snorts and shakes of the head. It was always a ‘preposterous suggestion’ or a ‘ridiculous proposition’. Of course, this was the Sheldon that Leonard had known for years now, not the guy he had been living with the past week or so. This Sheldon played bongos at midnight, gave up his work at MIT, and laid his lips on Penny, twice, without a moment’s consideration of germs or propriety. The rules had changed, all bets were off. Sheldon wasn’t talking or denying a thing.

“I really wish I could answer your questions, Leonard,” said Penny eventually. “The fact is, I know you and me are better as friends than anything else, but me and Sheldon, I... I just don’t know anymore” she said genuinely and hopelessly as she shifted her gaze from her boyfriend to the man in question. “Sheldon, do you even know what's happening with us?” she asked him desperately.

He opened his mouth to answer and then closed it again. It was a strange anomaly not to know things and yet he supposed he had to admit the truth that he really didn’t this time around. His experiment seemed to have raised more points than it solved and there really hadn’t been time to collate all the data never mind figure out how to move forward with his thesis on the subject of himself and Penny.

“I’m afraid that with the current data alone, I couldn’t possibly make any definite proclamations on the topic.”

Penny wanted to laugh. Anybody else would have just said ‘no’, but not her Sheldon. The possessive pronoun caught her off guard, even in her own head. Not least because it was only thanks to Sheldon she knew what a possessive pronoun was! She recovered fast when forced to meet Leonard’s downcast expression once again.

“I can’t deal with this,” he shook his head. “You want us to be over, Penny? Fine. Do as many experiments as you want, just don’t expect me to be happy about it.”

He stormed out and slammed the door like a child having a tantrum. Sheldon watched him go, not even jumping when the door thudded shut in his friend’s wake. Eyes still fixed on the exit through which Leonard had passed, he spoke.

“I don’t suppose a person can be expected to take it in anything like good humour when he finds his best friend and girlfriend engaged in such activities,” he shrugged. “However, I do think Leonard should consider the fact that...”

Sheldon stopped talking abruptly when he turned around and found Penny was no longer stood beside him but slumped down on the couch with her face in her hands. From the way her shoulders were shaking, he was certain she was crying. Sheldon didn’t really know what to do about that. Sinking down to sit beside Penny, he considered if he was supposed to hug her or not. His arms moved in awkward gestures as he tried to work out what was proper and appropriate, what Penny might appreciate and what he himself could handle. It might seem somewhat ridiculous to anyone else, that a man could kiss a woman the way Sheldon had kissed Penny just moments ago, and yet couldn’t figure out if giving her hug when she was upset was okay, not just with her but because of his own hang ups too.

“Penny?” he said eventually, laying one careful hand on her shoulder. “Please, tell me what is making you so sad?”

As her hands came away from her face, she seemed to be laughing as much as she was crying, just for a moment. The fact that Sheldon couldn’t tell what was wrong just from what had happened in the last few minutes ought to be extraordinarily stupid, and yet she had half expected the question. It proved how well she knew him at least.

“Y’know what? I’m not even sure I know,” she admitted, sniffing hard and wiping tears from her cheeks with the backs of her hands. “I mean, it can’t be because me and Leonard broke up. I’ve known that was coming for a while now. I do hate that he’s so upset though. He’s a good friend.”

“He is a good friend,” Sheldon considered. “It was never my intention to cause him pain. I certainly had no plans on making you cry.”

“I know, sweetie,” Penny assured him, patting the hand that was still on her shoulder.

She turned towards him and found his face awfully close to her own. Thoughts of their passion in the hallway came back to the surface and made her shiver. This was an officially crazy situation. There was no way Penny ever expected to be having these thoughts and feelings in connection with Sheldon Cooper. Sure, in the beginning when they first met she thought he might like her. All the guys seemed to. As they got to know each other and she discovered all his quirks and foibles, from the downright cute to the real pain in the ass type, they had become a strange kind of friends. Penny was sure Sheldon would never have any kind of relationship with another person, nothing romantic, certainly nothing sexual. That day when he had decided to throw away the rule book which had led to his laying his lips on her, it was a revelation for Penny as well as for Sheldon himself. Now a person she considered a good friend was also a man that could spark something in her she hadn’t felt in years, if ever. Certainly something she never felt with Leonard.

All happy thoughts of a fun adventure with Sheldon 2.0 and his want to make discoveries about physical activities with Penny went right out of the window when she thought of Leonard. She had hurt him, that was why she was so upset before. She never wanted that to happen. If she could have just let him down gently it might’ve been easier but for him to just walk out and see her and Sheldon kissing, it wasn’t good at all.

“Oh, I am not a good person,” she said to herself, looking down, until Sheldon’s fingers strayed from her shoulder to her face and encouraged her to meet his eyes.

“I’m not so sure I am either,” he said worriedly. “Penny, I don’t understand what’s happening to me.”

“Hey, at least you’re not alone in that,” she tried for a smile but it didn’t really come off. “Er, I don’t think Leonard is going to be too happy if you go home right now,” she considered, though letting him stay here might just lead to no good.

Sheldon nodded that he understood. Even he knew what he had done was wrong, causing Penny to cheat on the man that was both her boyfriend and his own best friend. Some people needed time to cool off, and it was a well-known fact that short people had short tempers to match, even if that didn’t necessarily make scientific or mathematical sense.

“I’ll make some coffee,” said Penny, getting up very suddenly and walking away to the kitchen.

She wasn’t really thirsty, and if she were, Penny knew she would usually be more likely to reach for the wine bottle than the coffee pot. The fact was she couldn’t risk it right now. Here alone with Sheldon after everything, she might just do something very stupid, and right now she was pretty sure he would be into it too. That was as scary as it was exciting. Penny felt sick.


	9. Chapter 9

Penny wasn’t sure how long she and Sheldon had been sat silently on the couch. She got up to make coffee a few minutes after Leonard left, though neither she nor Sheldon had drunk much from the cups, and the contents were now stone cold. She flipped on the TV a while ago. Penny went past several shopping channels, not even paying any mind to the shoe sales, through a couple of soap operas, music videos, movie re-runs. If she saw any of the pictures that danced before her eyes, it didn’t show. Still, Penny couldn’t look away because that would mean looking at Sheldon and actually starting a conversation she wasn’t sure how to have. He didn’t exactly seem willing either. She wondered if it was significant that he hadn’t left yet, but then she remembered that his choices were facing her or facing Leonard, neither of which probably appealed.

Honestly, Sheldon was still trying to do calculations in his head as to how on earth he got himself into this situation in the first place. None of it made any sense at all, but then he probably should have expected that when he decided to remove so many rules from his life. On the one hand, Sheldon supposed that he could just go back to the way things had been before. It wouldn’t fix everything but it ought to stop any more problems from occurring. However, there were plenty of reasons why he wouldn’t want to change the series of events that had led him here. It was a relief to know Amy Farrah Fowler was back to being a friend rather than the girlfriend he never wanted. Then there was Penny.

The moment Sheldon dared to let his eyes wander to her face, Penny sighed and flipped off the TV. He wondered if it was a reaction to his paying particular attention to her or if she was just as aggravated as he was by her incessant channel hopping. He might’ve said something about it sooner but this was her apartment and her TV, she had the right to do whatever she wanted. Besides, if they started a conversation she would probably be asking him for answers he just didn’t have. Right on cue, she did just that.

“So, the experiment,” she said, her words sounding overly loud in a room that had been devoid of human voices for far too long. “You were trying to see if, what? Kissing me felt... good?” she asked, feeling dumb just trying to put into words, still not knowing if they were the right ones.

“In simplistic terms, yes, I was,” Sheldon told her, looking everywhere but at Penny.

She waited for him to go on but he didn’t bother.

“And?” she prompted, trying to meet his eyes but he refused to look up.

“And it is almost impossible to extrapolate data when there is so little evidence to hand,” said Sheldon eventually, glancing up only once and very briefly to look at her surprised expression. “My frame of reference is unsurprisingly small when it comes to my body’s reactions to this type of activity. As you may or may not be aware, the only woman I have ever kissed in a non-familial manner is you.”

“But Amy...?” Penny immediately began to protest, until Sheldon shook his head and finished her sentence for her.

“Amy often tried to kiss me. I never initiated that kind of intimacy and never enjoyed it when it was forced upon me.”

Penny immediately felt bad for both her friends. Amy would hate to think her advances were really disliked that much, but at the same time, it seemed unfair that Sheldon felt he had to endure things he didn’t want from her. Right now that relationship was not the one in question, though Penny couldn’t just let it alone, not now.

“So, you... you didn’t feel anything when Amy kissed you?”

“I felt the urge to run, to hide, to disinfect my face in general,” said Sheldon, shifting awkwardly in his seat.

He had never told anyone these things that seemed private and wrong to share without causing confusion or offence, but then Penny was always someone he could turn to. He couldn’t say she never judged because sometimes she really did, but she always tried to be kind even in moments when she seemed awkward about being so.

“Poor Amy,” she said sadly on hearing his tale of woe - at that Sheldon became incensed.

“I’m sorry, poor Amy?” he echoed too loudly and with a look of astonishment on his features. “If you must feel sorry for anyone, how about poor Sheldon?” he suggested. “First, I am forced to endure Amy’s need for my lips against hers, and now I seem to be constantly compelled to join my face to yours!” he told Penny who now looked as dumb-founded as Sheldon himself. “Pleasure for me was always simple to find - a job well done, a scientific discovery made, a brand new box set of a Joss Whedon television drama - now I find myself aroused by a woman, like some caveman with no reasonable sense to follow, only base urges! It is more than a little unsettling.”

Penny’s eyes were wide as saucers as she processed everything she just heard. Unfortunately, in spite of all that Sheldon had said about his own suffering and confusion, her mind was sticking on one particular word he had said. No matter how she tried to think logically about the fact Sheldon had just said he was attracted to her, or that he had suffered whilst ‘dating’ Amy, all she could think of was this one unlikely word from Sheldon’s lips that echoed over and over in her head.

“Aroused?”

His eyes narrowed as he shot her a warning look.

“Penny!”

“Hey, I’m just repeating what you said!” she told him, hands raised in mock surrender, a smirk coming to her lips that she couldn’t help.

He was trying to be so severe, to look at her with anger but he was failing miserably. She really had just repeated a word that he said, Sheldon couldn’t deny it, and Penny was as full of nervous laughter as she was flattered by the idea of it. It was quite a compliment to be paid, that she was the one woman in the world capable of stirring something in Sheldon Cooper that had never been stirred before. She felt oddly powerful and overwhelmed at the same time, there was a giddiness attached to it that made her smile uncontrollably.

For his part, Sheldon didn’t know what reaction he was supposed to have to any of this, but the fact Penny was smiling gave him leave to do the same. He felt so at ease with her most of the time, never really uncomfortable because she didn’t allow that. Whatever problem he came to her with, be it about Leonard or Amy or even work, she would always try to help. She was unsuccessful in her advice at times, but the effort was always there, the caring. Sheldon never really had that before, not from someone unconnected with him. His mother cared, as did his sister and his Meemaw, but that was different. This whole thing with Penny, she was just entirely different to any other woman he had ever known. An anomaly of the highest order. After all these years, he still didn’t know what to make of her, especially not now that he had discovered what kissing her could cause him to feel.

“For what it’s worth,” she said then, looking oddly shy compared to her usual state around men. “I mean, my ‘pleasure’ has been coming from guys for years now, at least some of it,” she admitted what he already knew. “But never from a guy like you.”

“Penny, there are no guys like me,” he told her, sounding pompous though she knew in reality he was just speaking the honest truth, “and apparently when it comes to my body’s natural instincts, there are no women like you.”

Penny bit her lip as she came over all oddly emotional at that confession.

“That might actually be the sweetest thing you ever said to me,” she admitted when she was sure her voice wouldn’t crack under the pressure.

Sheldon hadn’t meant to be sweet when he said it, they were both sure on that, but nothing could take away from the fact it was certainly nice for Penny to hear. There was no woman in the world like her, not one who could make Sheldon feel as she could. He was a singular man in so many ways, which made it all the more special to be the only one worth anything to him. Of course, none of this really helped them figure out how to move forward, either with each other or with Leonard and the guys. Her ex and his best friend were one and the same, and he had to be hurting pretty badly after what they had done. As for Howard and Raj, not to mention Amy and Bernadette, well, they would all be confused by this new situation. Honestly, Penny and Sheldon were confused enough themselves before anybody else even got involved.

“Sheldon?” she said eventually. “Where are you going to sleep tonight?”

Quite honestly, Sheldon wasn’t sure how to take that question. The obvious answer was in his own bed, but facing Leonard without answers or excuses to give him that might smooth things over, Sheldon wasn’t eager to go right now. A couple of weeks ago, even a few days before now, he might’ve asked to stay here, perhaps on Penny’s couch if he didn’t already know it was too short to accommodate his body. Now there were other connotations to the question. Suddenly it wasn’t quite so preposterous that she might be suggesting he spend the night in her bed alongside her. Sheldon shuddered at the thought, and for a change it wasn’t a shiver of pure fear or disgust.

“Penny, I don’t think...” he began to answer her question, a little put out by the way she suddenly cracked up.

Penny’s hand went to her mouth as the laughter came in great gasping waves. It shouldn’t be funny, it really shouldn’t, and yet it was. Perhaps it was nerves as much as humour making her react this way, Penny honestly wasn’t sure, all she knew was that she simply could not stop her body convulsing with laughter at the prospect of Sheldon taking her question in a seductive context. She genuinely hadn’t meant it that way, it had just been a thoughtless moment of literalness. Now the idea was in her head that she might have just made an invitation, and the look of fear in Sheldon’s eyes at the prospect just sent her into fits.

“I’m so sorry,” she gasped out, bending double as she tried to regain her breath. “I really am, Sheldon, I’m sorry.”

“You don’t sound entirely genuine in your apology,” he said flatly. “Perhaps you would be better served explaining what exactly you’re sorry for.”

His hurt expression and sad tone sobered Penny up in a moment. She really hadn’t meant to offend him, not at all.

“Sweetie, I am sorry,” she said one more time, her hand over her heart. “I really didn’t mean to hurt you, I just... I heard what I said inside my own head and I realised what it sounded like. I wasn’t propositioning you, I swear, and even though it’s maybe not the craziest idea in the world right now, it should be, shouldn’t it?

“It’s the craziest idea in the world that you should find me desirable?” he checked he was understanding what she was saying to him.

With Penny it wasn’t always clear, and on this one and only topic, Sheldon would admit to being an amateur.

“Well, no,” she considered, after all that didn’t sound flattering, and in any case, she had been having some pretty hot and steamy thoughts about the guy lately. “But you’re not.. Sheldon, you are not my usual type of guy, you know that, and your type of woman doesn’t even exist, not for romance or... or sex or anything.”

Penny couldn’t remember the last time she ever felt genuinely embarrassed about mentioning sex. She was a woman of the world, she had known her share of guys, maybe more than her share if she were honest, though she wasn’t entirely proud of that. Somehow in front of Sheldon, even the word for the act seemed dirty and something to blush about. Penny hadn’t blushed like this over sex since she was fourteen!

“I have to agree that I have not the stature or lack of intelligence that many of your boyfriends have possessed,” said Sheldon then. “And up until the last few days, I certainly would have also agreed that there was no woman in the world that could ever entice me into coitus. Of course, as outer influences shift, the outcome changes, which has led us to this moment.”

Penny gaped a little at what he just said. If she didn’t know better she would swear that Sheldon just suggested he might want to have sex with her at some point. Not now, not when they had only just gotten somewhere with the kissing, but some day, at some point in the future. Not so long ago, she knew that would have freaked her out, but now it was sweet, romantic even. Penny had no idea Sheldon had it in him to be romantic. She should’ve known better. The guy could turn his hand to anything if he chose to, he had proven that many times, especially most recently with his kissing technique that was in no way well-practised but certainly worked for Penny!

“Oh, sweetie,” she sighed then, letting her hand fall over his on the couch. “This is all kind of huge. I mean, I only just broke up with Leonard a couple of hours ago, and you and Amy were boyfriend-girlfriend until a couple of days ago, plus you’ve never... I mean, even with Amy, you two weren’t...”

“Having coitus?” he prompted.

Penny immediately shook her head.

“Er, no. Well, yeah, you weren’t doing that, but you guys didn’t do anything physical really, at least you never wanted to, and I... I’m not really sure how to handle any of this, the you and me thing that’s happening lately.”

“On that at least we are united in our confusion,” Sheldon sighed.

He honestly didn’t know what he was doing. Giving up his job, living more vicariously than ever, without watching what he ate, when he used the bathroom, or what pyjamas he wore had felt freeing. Sheldon Cooper thought he could never feel more alive than this - and then he kissed Penny. Something was happening to him that he could not describe or make a sound reasoning for. It was some comfort to know that Penny was at a loss too, especially when she was, to his mind, a veritable expert in the field of sex and male-female relationships.

“I think I should go home,” he said then, standing up without a moment’s pause. “Leonard will still be angry, I’m sure, but then he often is, and over things I don’t fully understand. He takes life too seriously sometimes,” he muttered as he headed for the door, stopping before actually leaving and turning back. “I’m sorry, Penny, that my latest life-altering experiments seem to be causing such turbulence in your own life. It was never my intention...”

“I know, sweetie,” she interrupted him with a smile .”It’s fine. We’ll figure it out, eventually.”

He nodded his agreement to that before finally leaving. As the door clicked shut behind him, Penny let out a long breath. She said they would figure this out and she meant it, but honestly? She had no idea how!


	10. Chapter 10

When Sheldon had come home from Penny’s apartment last night, Leonard was nowhere to be seen. He had considered carefully whether he should go and knock on his room-mate’s bedroom door, if only to check he was there. In the end he decided that since an apology was due, the only proper thing to do was indeed to knock and say his piece, whether Leonard let him in or not. The exchange had been brief since he barely got into the second round of triple-knocking when Leonard told him to go anyway, complete with expletives hardly ever heard in the Cooper-Hofstadter apartment. Still, Sheldon completed his knocking ritual and then said what he had to say. He was sorry to have hurt Leonard’s feelings but at the same time pointed out it was only an experiment in the first instance and in no way supposed to encroach on any girlfriend-boyfriend agreement Leonard and Penny shared. He got no answer after that and so Sheldon gave up and went to bed.

Somehow he had expected that by the morning Leonard would be in a better mood, or at the very least be able to give some indication of how many days he felt it was necessary to be mad at his friend before things got back to normal. Things were made rather more complicated by the fact that when Sheldon rose at his usual Sunday-morning time, he went through to the kitchen and found a note on the counter top.

‘Gone to Vegas with Wolowitz and Koothrapali. Don’t call me’ was all it said, in Leonard’s own hand.

Sheldon was astounded. His friends had taken a trip without him, which was usually highly unacceptable. Without his planning system, doubtless they would run into trouble, and yet Leonard had requested Sheldon not call him, to give travel advice or otherwise. On the other hand they had gone to Vegas once before and without anything too terrible befalling them, and certainly he had no want to go to such a place as the gambling capital of the Nevada desert. With a shrug, Sheldon put the note to one side and got on with preparing his breakfast.

* * *

“I mean, of all the guys in the world!” Leonard was complaining, several drinks in and listing badly to the left as he trudged up to his hotel room, supported by his friends. “I could take being dumped for Penny’s usual type. I get that I don’t have the muscles and the motorcycle and the lack of brain capacity that she usually goes for, but Sheldon?! That’s like choosing Val Kilmer’s Batman over Christian Bale’s Batman. Who does that?!”

“I honestly wouldn’t know,” said Howard, as he helped manoeuvre Leonard into the room and carelessly dropped him face first on his bed.

“For a little dude, he’s heavy,” said Raj, shaking out his arms that ached from the effort of mostly dragging Leonard up here.

“And he really can’t hold his drink,” Howard agreed, turning Leonard over onto his back to save him from suffocating.

It was a little surprising to suddenly hear him laugh.

“It’s almost funny,” he chuckled. “Losing a woman to Sheldon. I know he’s been embracing the chaos lately but this is pure insanity. Like a paral- a parara- a different dimension!” he said eventually, since drunk Leonard just couldn’t deal with the technicalities of ‘parallel’ right now.

“I hear you, brother!” Raj agreed emphatically. “I mean, first Howard and Bernadette and now Sheldon and Penny? That truly is insane when you consider how very, very lonely I am,” he considered.

“Hey, Sheldon has good points,” Howard defended their absent friend, then off the looks he received from Raj and Leonard, he shrugged. “I couldn’t list them, but he has to have them, right? We’ve been friends with him so long…”

“Well, not anymore!” said Leonard definitely, falling back against the pillows once more. “That’s it. Me and Sheldon are done. He wants to embrace the anarchy and kiss my girlfriend? Fine, but I am over it. I’m going to mess with the thermostat, I’m going to mix up his pyjamas, and I’m going to ruin his bathroom schedule!”

“Er, Leonard? Isn’t the point that Sheldon already stopped caring about all that stuff?” asked Howard. “I mean, when he did this whole bongo-playing, Penny-kissing escapade, he gave up all the annoying habits, or a lot of them anyway.”

“That is true. He didn’t make any comments at all about the food we ordered this weekend, though he was still pretty stuck on his spot on the couch,” Raj frowned then. “I guess Rome wasn’t built in a day, and Sheldon is way more complex than the Romans.”

Leonard felt frustrated and sad and very, very drunk. The guys were right, there was almost nothing he could do to mess with Sheldon right now, because the guy had allowed all his usual routines to devolve into anarchy and chaos. Maybe that was why Penny was suddenly attracted to him, although Leonard couldn’t really believe that was all it was.

The truth was almost too painful to think about, Leonard’s friend and his girlfriend always did have a better relationship than he and Penny ever could. They dated, they kissed, they had sex, but when it came to talking, to connecting and understanding each other, there was little basis for any kind of real relationship. Penny and Sheldon had their own in-jokes. She would always go to him in a tech crisis and he would run to her for emotional support. Leonard was sure all this only hurt so much because he knew it made sense.

He got distracted from his painful thought process when he heard Howard and Raj talking about him a few feet away from the bed.

“What do we do now?”

“I don’t know, I mean, when I was feeling sad and lonely, you guys got me a hooker but you think Leonard would go for that?”

“Well, maybe,” Raj considered. “Not that he didn’t like Penny, but I’m not sure this is as much about her as it is about just having a woman to call his own.”

“What did you say?” asked Leonard himself, sitting up so fast that his head spun wildly. “You think I don’t care about Penny? I care about Penny!” he insisted.

“We know that, buddy,” Howard agreed. “We’re just... Raj, what are you talking about?” he snapped at his friend, knowing it was unfair but not wanting to cause Leonard any more pain than was necessary.

“Well, think about it,” said Raj, looking at his drunken friend on the bed. “You dated Leslie Winkle and Dr Stephanie, and you were happy enough. In between you bounce back and forth to Penny, but can you honestly say you love her, more than any other woman in the world?” he checked.

Leonard looked confused, or possibly sick, most likely both given the state he was in.

“Yes... or no,” he considered. “I don’t know!” he declared hopelessly, letting his body flop back against the mattress. “I care about Penny, she’s... I’ve been in love with her this whole time... haven’t I?”

“As crazy as it sounds, maybe Sheldon has too?” suggested Howard, even though he knew the idea of it was as nuts as the man he was speaking of.

“Sheldon? In love?” Leonard might’ve laughed into those words if he could find any humour at all in his situation right now, but he couldn’t.

“Why is that so hard to believe?” said Raj, coming to sit down by his friend. “Sheldon is human after all, a weird type of human maybe, but still,” he said thoughtfully. “Maybe he just needed to embrace his true feelings to realise it, poor guy.”

“Hey, can we just focus on me right now?!” Leonard complained, when it seemed all focus and sympathy seemed to be going to his former best friend. “I’m the one that got cheated on and dumped!” he reminded his buddies.

“As if we could forget,” Howard muttered, coming to sit on the other side of the bed from Raj.

“What do you want to do, Leonard?” asked Raj. “Because if you want to cry, y’know, that’s okay.”

“I don’t wanna cry,” Leonard complained, putting his hands over his face, not even sure where his glasses had got to and not caring either. “I just... I wanna know what happened to my life, to my relationship with Penny. How did things get so bad that Sheldon looked like a better option than me?”

Howard and Raj both looked at Leonard and then across at each other. Raj shrugged. Howard got up and headed directly for the mini bar.

“This conversation is going to need more booze.”

* * *

_Knock, knock, knock_

“Penny?”

_Knock, knock, knock_

“Penny?”

_Knock, knock, knock_

“Penny?”

Sheldon waited patiently on the doorstep until his neighbour appeared. He had waited until after eleven as was protocol with Penny, but had only made it to 11.04 before he just couldn’t stand it any longer. Sheldon didn’t function well on limited sleep, and with his head as busy as it was, there was little to no chance of rest. He needed to talk to someone and his only option right now was Penny.

“Hey,” she smiled as she opened the door.

If he had been more observant with regards to the facial expressions and body language of others, Sheldon might have noticed how nervous she seemed, but as it was he had no idea. Penny just didn’t know what the proper way to behave around this guy was at the moment. When they were friends it was fine, but now he liked her, really liked her and he was so inexperienced and unsure about women, far from making her feel powerful and in control, Penny felt strangely out of her depth.

“Leonard is gone,” he told her, quickly explaining before she had a chance to elaborate. “Apparently the way to get over a break up is still Las Vegas, as it was four years ago when Wolowitz suffered a similar fate at the hands of Leslie Winkle,” he explained. “Not that I would compare you with her, that would be grossly unfair to both parties.”

Penny wasn’t sure if that was a compliment or not. She knew how smart Leslie was, but she also knew how much Sheldon hated her. She shook her head and let it go, it didn’t matter right now.

“Er, okay,” she said awkwardly. “Is that all you came over here for? To tell me Leonard, and I assume the guys as well, have gone to Vegas?”

“No,” Sheldon confirmed. “I was hoping to come in and talk to you.”

Penny nodded in understanding and moved aside to let him into the apartment. Once he was in he started pacing. On his next trip back across the floor, he almost ran completely into Penny after she closed the door and turned around. Sheldon looked startled by her closeness and immediately backed up a couple of steps.

“Penny,” he began, arms folded across his chest a moment, and then just as quickly by his sides as if he didn’t know what to do with himself. “Usually when it comes to relationships, especially with women, I would refer to Leonard. He has limited experience, but still a larger frame of reference than myself,” he explained. “In his absence, I might come to your good self for advice, but obviously, in the circumstances...”

He waved a hand in some random gesture so he didn’t have to say more, sure that even Penny, who was not always the sharpest of people, understood exactly what he was getting at.

“Yeah, circumstances,” she noded along, looking as awkward as he felt.

“However, you are an aspiring actress, and so I have a proposal,” Sheldon continued then. “Is it possible that you could, for the duration of one conversation, take on the role of my friend-slash-bartender and assist me with my latest quandary?”

Penny frowned a little at the question taking a moment to translate from Sheldon-speak and finding it didn’t really help. She really wasn’t sure if she could act like she wasn’t the woman causing Sheldon a problem right now and give decent advice, but in the long run she couldn’t see she had anything to lose. Penny certainly didn’t have any plan of her own for how she and Sheldon were going to move forward in whatever this thing was between them.

“Okay,” she said eventually. “I mean, I guess I could try.”

“It’s all I ask,” Sheldon smiled. “Just forget everything that has happened between us, and try to keep your lustful feelings for me in check,” he advised, moving to sit on a stool at the breakfast bar.

Penny smirked a little as she tried not to laugh. She would hardly say she had lustful feelings for Sheldon exactly, although when he kissed her he had more than curled her toes, that was for sure. Well, maybe she did have those feelings, but not so bad that she was about to rip his clothes off just from looking at him. Theirs wasn’t really that kind of relationship.

“Okay then,” she said, shaking all those thoughts from her head.

She moved around into the kitchen, grabbed a glass from under the counter and got herself into the part she was playing. It was just an acting gig, she was just playing a role, and whatever Sheldon said to her, he was talking about someone else, a make believe woman, somebody who wasn’t her at all. Penny wasn’t sure if this would work but she was giving it her best shot.

“Hey, Sheldon, nice to see you,” she smiled overly-brightly. “What can I get you to drink?”

“I’ll have a diet Cuba Libre please,” he replied politely.

Penny was about to ask if he wanted it virgin, but somehow that word had a whole new meaning now when she looked at Sheldon and the question died on her lips. If he didn’t want the booze he would say so she supposed, reaching for the rum bottle and pouring a healthy measure. It was eleven in the morning, but Sheldon watched her do it and didn’t flinch. He really was just full of surprises lately, and apparently that wasn’t stopping any time soon.

“Here,” she said eventually, passing him his drink, pouring herself the same because she had a feeling she was going to need it.

“Thank you,” Sheldon sighed sadly then took a long sip. “Hey, that’s pretty good,” he grinned, gulping down a couple more mouthfuls. “But I doubt it will help. Penny, I am having quite the emotional situation... with a woman,” he told her.

Penny kept her glass to her lips for another drink before she replied.

“Really? Well, anything I can help with, sweetie?” she said, concentrating more on wiping down her ‘bar’ than looking at him.

“Well, now, I wonder if perhaps you could,” he said, acting his part as much as she was and clearly enjoying it. “I find myself in a wholly new situation. As you know, I have always lived my life by certain rules in a wholly regimented pattern of events, helped by lists and charts. When I decided to give up on many of these routines I actually found the experience quite freeing,” he smiled fondly as he thought about it. “However, as with most things, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. I have managed to alienate a good friend of mine because as it turns out I have become attracted to his girlfriend.”

“Okay,” Penny nodded, trying to think laterally and act as if this was a neutral situation that she wasn’t involved in. “Well, what did you do about your attraction to this woman?” she asked.

It felt dumb, asking something she already knew the answer to, but this was how Sheldon wanted to play it, and if it helped him feel better or even helped the two of them figure out where they went from here, she would try. There was nothing else to do.

“I’m afraid I broke all the rules of friendship and kissed her,” Sheldon admitted. “More than once, the latter time being disguised as an experiment to see if the first instance had in fact been a fluke,” he explained, staring into his drink, just because it was easier than looking at Penny right now. “I lied to myself as much as to her and my friend by saying it was purely an experiment, in truth the urge to feel her lips against mine was so great, it could no longer be denied.”

Penny swallowed hard, looked into her drink and decided to down much of what remained in her glass. There was no way she could handle this fully sober.

“I have never been attracted to women before, not in such a way as this. I understood that the shape and size of certain attributes can be appealing, and I will admit to a general curiosity about those anatomical regions that belong purely to the female of our species,” he went on. “However, only this one particular woman has caused me such confusion. I would say that it has only been recently, but in truth I had started to notice certain factors before now. A quickening of my heart rate, a shortness of breath, whenever she dresses provocatively or pays me a particular compliment. These are things I decided had to be anomalies, an allergy playing up, anything but actual reactions to her presence, to her charms for want of a better phrase,” he continued, taking a long drink from his glass. “Now that I have kissed her, I realise there is much more to this attraction than I ever could have suspected before. I see now that as far evolved as my mind may be, I possess the body of a man with all the urges and such that entails. However, it would appear such things are only triggered by this one woman.”

He looked up then and meet Penny’s eyes that were wide as saucers. If Sheldon was waiting for her to say something she wished he would tell her what it was, because there wasn’t a word in her head right now but ‘wow’.

“Now, if you were in my situation, what would you do, Penny?” he asked eventually.

She was floored. Absolutely bowled over. Sure, Sheldon had said last night she was special and apparently the only woman that ever turned him on, but now this speech, this whole explanation that revealed he had on some level always liked her, always been attracted to her. Poor Sheldon had stood by and watched her date not just a long line of meat-headed losers, but also his best friend, and all this time he had been wondering on his own feelings. No wonder that when he let chaos invade his life he took the opportunity of kissing her, just to see how it felt. It wasn’t just to know the touch of a woman, it was her specifically, always.

“Er, if I realised I was attracted to a person that...” she began, not really sure where she was going with this but knowing she had to say something. “Well, it’s hard to say how I would act in your position, Sheldon. I mean, we’re very different people. I’m kind of the dive right in to it girl, and you’re... well, you’re inexperienced and...”

“You think that would bother her?” he cut in. “The woman I’m attracted to, do you think it would matter to her that I am without carnal knowledge?”

She smiled and bit her lip as she considered the question for all of three seconds, then shook her head.

“No, sweetie. If she cares about you too, it really won’t matter that you’re... that you’ve never... It just won’t matter,” she confirmed. “But don’t you think the bigger problem is going to be that she was dating your friend?”

“Yes, I suppose that will always be an issue,” he sighed heavily then drained the rest of his drink. “I am terrible at keeping secrets and telling lies, so that would never be an option. Do you suppose that given time, my friend might simply get over it?”

“I guess he might,” Penny shrugged helplessly. “I couldn’t say for sure, but... Well, Sheldon, do you think it’s worth the risk. Am I... Is this woman,” she corrected herself when he winced at the breaking of their charade. “Is she worth possibly losing your best friend for, when she can’t promise you anything?”

Sheldon considered for a long moment and Penny watched so many emotions play across his face. This was a very big deal. They were talking about Sheldon taking a leap into real dating, investing emotionally, even physically in a real relationship with a woman, and genuinely risking the friendship he had with Leonard. It was a very big deal.

“Penny,” he said eventually, startling her some even though she had been waiting for him to speak.

“Sheldon?” she said back, not sure what he was looking for as he seemed to be searching her eyes.

“Having assessed the risk...” he considered, hopping down from his stool onto unsteady legs.

Penny reached out to help him, hands grabbing onto his arms as they came face to face around the end of the breakfast bar.

“Having assessed the risk...?” she prompted when he said no more.

Sheldon shook his head, knowing he couldn’t form the words right now. That was new for him, but between the alcohol and his overwhelming feelings for Penny perhaps it wasn’t much of a surprise. It was certainly a bit of a shock to her when suddenly his hand was in her hair and his lips were crushed against hers all over again. Apparently they hadn’t gotten much further in figuring out how they were going to make this work, but damn if Penny wasn’t certain that they had to try somehow. She wasn’t giving up getting kissed like this for anything in the world!


	11. Chapter 11

Penny had been downstairs putting out the trash when Bernadette appeared. It wasn’t that big of a shock to see her, after all, Penny knew Howard had gone with Raj and Leonard to Vegas, and it wasn’t as if she and Bernadette weren’t good friends. Of course the look of dread on her face had a purpose. She was kind of worried about getting a sensible outsider perspective on what had happened the last few days. Sure, Bernadette wasn’t exactly the greatest person to refer to with regards to guys. She was just strange enough to want to marry Howard Wolowitz, but she was a nice person, and a good friend. Penny was so conflicted between being glad to have someone to talk to and worrying she was about to be told she was a terrible or potentially crazy person.

“I thought maybe you needed someone to talk to,” said Bernadette kindly as she went with Penny up the three flights of stairs to her apartment. “This whole situation can’t be easy on anybody, but at least the guys have each other to turn to. It suddenly occurred to me that you don’t really have anybody, except for me, so here I am.” she smiled brightly.

Penny smiled too.

“Thank you, Bernadette,” she told her as they reached the landing. “I really appreciate you coming over. I’ll admit, I was kind of worried that maybe... well, I would understand if you felt like judging me. Stealing another girl’s boyfriend...”

“Oh please,” Bernadette literally waved away Penny’s concerns as they headed on into the apartment. “Amy and Sheldon weren’t dating, not really. I mean, I get that not all people just leap into bed and that’s fine, but those two were just not normal together,” she shook her head, a look of vague distaste on her features.

“I still cheated on Leonard,” Penny sighed as they sat down together on the couch. “As much as I know it had to be over with him, I really should’ve told the guy before anything else happened.”

Bernadette knew that was true, but honestly, she was way too excited to hear what was happening with Penny and Sheldon to feel all that badly for Leonard. Sometimes Hofstadter was just too clingy and weird. Besides, she often wondered how much he really cared for Penny and how much he just wanted to be with somebody, anybody, who would sleep with him.

“I’m sure Leonard will be fine,” she assured her friend. “I’m more worried about you and Sheldon. I mean, this is kind of different for you and a whole other world for him from what I’ve seen, and of course from what Howie told me. Before you, he never even kissed a woman, did he?”

“Nope,” Penny popped the P on her word and shook her head, a strange smile coming to her lips then that would make no sense to Bernadette. “He says he doesn’t know what he’s doing, y’know with kissing and making out?” she explained. “But seriously? It sure does feel like he knows.”

Bernadette was surprised but giggled like a teen at the way Penny was talking and more than that the look on her face. It didn’t matter that they were grown women, talking about boys and kissing always made her regress about ten years and she didn’t care if that was strange.

“Maybe he read books, or just has really good instincts,” Bernadette grinned. “Is he really good?”

“Really, really good,” Penny confirmed, almost blushing at her own confession, which was kind of new for her. “I mean, we haven’t... It was just kissing and stuff,” she confirmed. “I was kind of trying to keep it to his speed, giving how inexperienced he is, but it still felt pretty damn good, at least until he left suddenly.”

“Suddenly?” Bernadette frowned at that. “Why would he leave so suddenly if you were having such a good time?”

Penny looked away, biting her lip.

“Er, well... Sheldon was... Something came up,” she said pointedly.

It took Bernadette a moment to figure out exactly what she meant but when Penny’s words suddenly became clear to her she gasped. Both hands flew to her mouth and she laughed lightly. She hadn’t been expecting to be told that, and honestly, it was strange to think of Sheldon getting excited that way. The rest of the guys were all what one might call normal in their sexual appetites. They all stared when half-naked women appeared in movies and appreciated a good sex scene. Bernie had no problem with that, because she was the same about guys and all. Sheldon was the only person she ever met who could talk about picture quality and framing during a sexy scene on the TV. He didn’t seem to feel anything about anyone, male or female. In her head she had quite decide he just didn’t possess the urge. Such a thing as asexual existed and she was just fine with thinking one of her friends was that way, no problem at all. It seemed maybe she had been wrong. Sheldon very much did like girls, or more specifically, he liked Penny.

“Hmm,” she considered. “See, now I can understand why he’s attracted to you. Not that Sheldon ever seemed attracted to anybody but, I mean, look at you,” she gestured toward Penny. “You’re beautiful, you’re tall, you’ve got a body most women would kill for, and on top of that you’re a nice person. You’ve been a real friend to Sheldon so he knows he can trust you, and that’s important too,” she considered. “But, well, are you really attracted to Sheldon?”

The look on her face suggested to Penny that Bernadette really couldn’t understand how anybody ever would or could feel an attraction to the guy across the hall. True enough that Sheldon wasn’t exactly built like a wrestler, he didn’t look like Brad Pitt, and sometimes he could be thoughtless in the way he spoke. On the other hand, Penny had always thought he was weirdly cute in a skinny, nerdy way. When she managed to convince him to dress up nice, he was actually passably hot, and not everything was about looks. He was a real sweetheart sometimes, he cared even if he wasn’t always great at showing that or explaining it. Plus he was without question the smartest guy Penny ever knew. Up until she met this particular bunch of friends that she had now, she never would’ve thought intelligence could be attractive, but it kind of was.

“It feels strange,” she admitted to Bernadette then. “I mean, Sheldon is so far from the guys I usually go for. He’s even different to Leonard really, but... I like him a lot. I care about him, and... and even when he’s being ridiculous or insulting or crazy, it’s only because he’s trying to be honest,” she explained. “When I add it all up, the way we’re such great friends, the fact he’s so smart and everything, and then the way he can make me feel when he kisses me,” she smiled, counting up all the good points on her fingers with a silly grin on her face. “I’m having trouble finding a reason not to at least give it a try with Sheldon.”

Bernadette smiled at that but Penny wasn’t entirely convinced that was a good thing.

“You think I’m crazy?” she checked, needing to be sure.

Penny wasn’t sure if it would change her decision, but right now she just wanted the opinion anyway.

“Honestly? No, I don’t think you’re crazy,” Bernadette continued to smile. “I mean, sure, Sheldon is... well, he’s a special one,” she admitted, making Penny laugh slightly at the phrasing. “But he’s not a bad guy. I can’t see a scenario where he would cheat on you or hurt you so what’s wrong with giving it a try?” she said, shrugging her shoulders.

Penny felt better for hearing that from somebody else, a voice outside of her own head as it were. It still felt a little nuts to be seriously considering dating Sheldon, and he hadn’t even said he wanted to date her yet, but she wanted to try. Maybe it wouldn’t work out, but at the same time, maybe it was worth the risk. One thing was for sure, it would certainly be a very different dating experience to any she had ever had before.

“Thank you, sweetie,” she said, hugging Bernie tight. “I’m really glad you came over.”

* * *

Sheldon appreciated the peace and quiet of solitude. He really only had a room-mate for the sake of paying the rent and because he didn’t agree with leaving available bedrooms empty when someone might need one. Though he did not believe in God the way his mother did, many of her Christian values still rubbed off on him when he was growing up, like caring for his fellow man in at least some capacity. Having Leonard share his space was fine, they had become good friends, but Sheldon still enjoyed having the apartment to himself sometimes. Now was not one of those times.

Advice was not something Sheldon needed very often. He was so terrifically intelligent, he could mostly fend for himself, but where women were concerned he was usually at a loss. He had never needed to know how to woo a partner and always thought that if and when such a time ever came, he would excel at it. With all his intelligence and looks, he couldn’t imagine there was a woman who wouldn’t want him. Amy Farrah-Fowler had fallen from almost the first moment, but Penny, she was so very different.

Kissing her seemed to be no problem at all. Though he had little to no experience of the activities colloquially called ‘making out’, he surmised that following Penny’s lead and his own instincts should work out pretty well. For a man that wasn’t even sure how long to hug someone in thanks for a gift or great favour, how to handle himself in a romantic clinch really didn’t come easy at all. Still, Penny had responded favourably to his kiss and seemed happy enough to cling to him as the moment continued on her couch an hour or two earlier. It ought to have bothered him when her hands ran over his back and her body heat permeated his clothing, but it didn’t. Sheldon rarely lost his grip on rational thought but when Penny was close to him that way, he really couldn’t concentrate on anything but feelings, overwhelming feelings the like of which he had never known before, that had ultimately caused stirrings he had assumed himself to be more or less incapable of until it happened.

Leaving Penny’s apartment at speed may have seemed rude on reflection, but she seemed to be understanding of his predicament. Running out the door hadn’t come so easily in the circumstances, but quite honestly, it still bothered Sheldon to no end that he could be such a slave to the base urges of all men. On the other hand, if trying to resist meant giving up Penny altogether, he wasn’t sure he could bear to.

There was more to a relationship than sexual attraction, Sheldon knew that. Sure, Penny had a few that seemed to be based solely in the bedroom, but that wasn’t going to work with the two of them. They had been friends for years now, and turned to each other in time of crisis. She knew things about him he shared with no-one else, and he believed there were states he had seen her in that she would never let anyone else know about. They were close, in all kind of ways, and now in the most literal way possible. Still, Sheldon knew there was more to dating a woman than being friends that made out. That was purely ‘friends with benefits’ as he had learnt some time ago from Leonard. He and Penny could not be only that. When he was with Amy they went out on dates, and he treated her as a lady should be treated on such an occasion, paying for dinner, pulling out her chair, that kind of thing. It was the way a gentleman behaved in courting a woman, so his mother had tried to impress on him, back when she was trying to believe he was just like every other young man in the world. Now Sheldon recalled his Momma’s words with a smile. Perhaps she had the answer when it came to how to handle Penny, though he had no need to call and ask her about it. He would just follow the advice she had tried to force upon him so many years ago, that now, finally, might just prove useful.

_Knock, knock, knock_

“Penny?”

_Knock, knock, knock_

“Penny?”

_Knock, knock, knock_

“Penny?”

She opened the door with a smile, but was not given the chance to even say ‘hi’ before Sheldon cut in.

“Penny, would you do me the honour of going out with me tonight, on what shall henceforth be known as our first official date?” he blurted out all in a rush.

Penny’s eyes widened and her head whipped back a little as if the question had literally hit her in the face. She really hadn’t been expecting that and yet the moment she processed it she couldn’t help the wide smile that took over her face.

“Yes, Sheldon,” she told him. “I would love to go out on a date with you tonight,” she confirmed.

A smile came to his own lips at her answer, and Penny loved to see it. That natural look of happiness that was so rare to see on his face, and she had put it there. Maybe this whole thing could work out, as crazy as it seemed. Tonight they were obviously going to find out.


	12. Chapter 12

Penny wasn’t sure what to wear for a date with Sheldon Cooper. Usually her outfit for such an occasion would depend almost entirely on the activity. Sheldon had made it clear that his interpretation of a date was dinner and a movie, so that ought to help, but it really didn’t.

The problem was defining what kind of impression Penny was trying to give on this date, what sort of evening she was expecting to have with Sheldon. Some guys that took her to dinner thought the local fast food joint was acceptable, and that buying her a bucket of chicken meant they could feel her up in the back row thirty minutes later. Actually, Penny enjoyed a few of the nights that went that way and she dressed in such a way as to prove she was inclined to play along. Sheldon wasn’t that guy, he was pretty much a gentlemen, but Penny really didn’t have an outfit that would make her lady enough to match.

Pushing one dress after the other across to the far end of the rail, she sighed. Penny wouldn’t define her whole wardrobe as slutty exactly, but she knew what she had and she wasn’t afraid to flaunt it. Somehow she wasn’t so sure that was a look Sheldon would appreciate on a first date. Penny thought of Amy and burst out laughing, which might seem mean but honestly, she was just trying to imagine herself in the kind of clothes her friend wore - the picture in her head was hilarious.

Eventually, Penny ended up in the standard little black dress, hoping that would seem appropriate no matter where they ended up for dinner. Waiting for Sheldon to come calling was tougher still, since despite her clothing crisis, she found she was ready almost a full half hour before he was due to pick her up. It did occur to Penny as the modern woman that she was perfectly able to go across the hall and knock on the door, but this was a date with Sheldon and she doubted he would appreciate her messing with his plan. He would have a plan, she knew. For all that he seemed to have let go of some of his regimented rules of living, he maintained the triple knock on her door and doubtless had a timetable in place for something as foreign to him as a real date. He proved that when he arrived at exactly seven o’clock and rapped on her door in the usual way. Somehow that seemed to put Penny at ease at last and she was smiling genuinely as she moved to open the door.

“Hi,” she greeted him, liking his appearance in the smartest suit he owned, none of the usual scary plaid.

“Good evening, Penny,” he replied politely, offering her his arm. “Shall we go?”

“Oh, we shall,” she agreed, taking his offered arm and closing the apartment door behind them.

“Penny, may I say, you always look more than agreeable, but tonight you are exceptionally pleasing to the eye,” he said in the way only Sheldon could as they descended the first flight of stairs.

“Thank you, Sheldon,” she grinned, smoothing the fabric of her dress with her free hand. “You look great too, by the way.”

“You ought to think so,” he agreed. “After all, you helped pick out this very suit.”

That’s right, she had, and Penny ought to have realised it. She had been so floored by his appearance when she finally got him into this particular suit. Gone was any trace of the stereotypical geek Sheldon often looked like, and in his place something akin to James Bond. It was amazing what lie underneath if you just took the time to look. The thought of all this made Penny want to laugh. They were such an unlikely couple to anyone who didn’t know them, but as she caught sight of their reflections in the glass doors before they exited the building, she couldn’t imagine anybody ever looking more right for each other.

* * *

“I don’t know, Bernie, Leonard’s in a pretty bad way,” Howard told his fiancee over the phone as he and Raj ate together. “If I tell him Penny and Sheldon are going on an actual date tonight, I can’t see him wanting to come home... Well, I have to tell him now you told me,” he argued when she said he could not do so. Ccan you imagine the shock if we got back and found them... I don’t know, making out on the landing or something?”

Howard shuddered at the very thought of anyone making out with Sheldon, at which Raj rolled his eyes. He didn’t see what the big deal was really, apart from the fact that the man-robot was getting some action and he wasn’t. That cut deep for Raj, but he wouldn’t deny his friend a little happiness, or a little sugar. He certainly spent enough of his life without and Raj knew how much that sucked.

“Okay, Bernie, I’ll call you tonight. Love you,” Howard grinned, making smoochy noises as quietly as he could in a public place, and then hung up the phone.

“So, Penny and Sheldon, a real date,” said Raj thoughtfully. “That’s gotta be weird for both of them.”

“Yeah, and heart-breaking for Leonard,” Howard sighed. “The guy is such a mess. Vegas was supposed to help, but if we can’t even get him to leave the minibar in the room...”

“What does he have to get out for?” his friend shrugged. “He doesn’t really like to gamble, and he finds it tough to get the attention of women, well, apart from the ones that are paid for.”

“Maybe that’s exactly what he needs,” said Howard, digging into his food with gusto before it got cold. “I still say a hooker is the way to go.”

“For sweet dependable little Leonard who believes in love and commitment?” said Raj with wide eyes. “Dude, he would freak out!”

“Not if he didn’t know she was... a rental,” he said awkwardly as an elderly couple passed by their table to be seated. “The state he’s in now, he’ll believe anything. We pay a nice girl to be sweet and sympathetic, jump his bones, leave him feeling a little better about himself. I mean, c’mon, Raj. Losing a woman causes pain, but losing a woman to Sheldon? That’s a whole other level of mental destruction.”

Raj had to admit that Howard had a point. If paying for a hooker would cheer Leonard up, he supposed he would help out with that. At the same time, his mind was wandering to Penny and Sheldon. For all that they seemed mismatched on the surface, he could actually see them working as a couple. Of course, it was still pretty strange imagining Sheldon wanting to be close that way with anybody, even Penny. Raj wondered how they were getting along on their date, at least up until Howard dragged him off to a bar to find Leonard a nice new affordable friend.

* * *

Penny couldn’t stop smiling. Sure, it probably seemed a little awkward to anyone who saw her and Sheldon sitting silently at their table. Making conversation was sometimes hard for them anyway, when he got onto science stuff that flew over her head or she started on what he called the banal topics of shoes or her work at the Cheesecake Factory. Tonight it didn’t seem to matter. He had been such a gentleman, opening doors for her, pulling out her chair, complimenting her looks. Maybe it was a little mortifying when Sheldon inspected all the cutlery and had several pieces exchanged because he could see they hadn’t been correctly washed, but the fact he hadn’t run out of the restaurant screaming or just complaining loudly seemed like progress to Penny. This was actually a pretty decent first date so far, and she was definitely not sorry she had agreed to come.

“So, I’m a little stumped for a topic here,” she said then, no longer able to hide behind the menu since they had just finished ordering their meal. “I mean, first dates are usually a getting to know you kind of a thing, but we already know everything.”

“Actually it would be inaccurate for anyone to claim to know everything about another person, however close they may be,” Sheldon considered. “But I do understand that the preliminary question and answer inherent in a first meeting would be redundant on this occasion,” he said, much like a text book, which was not unusual for Sheldon.

“Okay, but sweetie, that’s not helping us find something to talk about,” she pointed out.

He stared a moment at where her hand was now on top of his own on the table. Penny was the type to touch people without thinking, some people were just that way inclined, and Sheldon always hated it, except with her.

It was still baffling to him how Penny was the exception to so many rules he had in his life, even those that still existed days after he let anarchy reign in his life. There were structures and plans he could live without but many he still felt compelled to keep in place. It didn’t matter, Penny always found a loop hole, deliberately or otherwise, and circumvented every defence. Not that Sheldon had been aware he was defending himself from her, but maybe he had been. It was hard to tell anymore.

“Sweetie?” Penny prompted when he was quiet too long. “Are you okay?” she checked.

Sheldon looked up from their joined hands and met her eyes, feeling quite overcome. He hadn’t had a drink yet, and they were not at altitude. There was no reason for the light-headed feeling he was getting, nothing but her.

“Penny,” he said, his voice coming out much lower than he intended. “I think that... that this may be a profound moment in my life.”

She wasn’t sure how to react to that confession and was prevented from having to come up with anything smart or funny or whatever when a waiter suddenly delivered their meal to the table. For a while their focus was the food, but after stealing a few glances at each other, eventually their eyes met. Penny smiled and Sheldon smiled back.

“This is really, really good,” she said around a mouthful of pasta.

“I agree,” he replied.

The serious moment was gone, and normal service had been resumed, if there really was such a thing as normal on a first date for these two. Something big was happening here, but it wasn’t quite so scary anymore, it was just good.

* * *

“You’re a nice girl,” said Leonard, stumbling a little against the tall brunette that had her arm wrapped around her. “You understand that I am a nice guy. I only want to love and be loved, be a boyfriend to someone,” he explained, slurring a little, almost laughing. “Nobody understands, except for you.”

“Of course, I understand,” she sympathised like the professional she was, fingers running through his hair as they reached the door to his hotel room. “You’re such a great guy, Leonard. I don’t know why any woman would want to give up on someone like you.”

When she moved in to kiss him, he was more than happy to let it happen. He was eager, even in his semi-drunken state, but Zoe was used to that. It didn’t matter. As many drinks as he’d had, she wasn’t even sure he was capable of much in the way of sex tonight. Still, whatever he wanted, she was willing. The guys that paid her did so well, and assured her this Leonard guy wasn’t exactly kinky. He wanted to feel loved by a woman who would be his girlfriend, or at the very least a substitute for the one who just dumped him. She could play sweet and understanding as well as she could play anything, and then when Leonard woke up in the morning he would find a note on the nightstand. She would say she was sorry but that she wasn’t good enough for him and never could be. That should sure boost his confiendece, that and the overenthusiasm she planned to show when they got into bed together. Honestly, Zoe could almost feel sorry for the guy, almost.

* * *

“I honestly wasn’t so sure I was going to enjoy it, but I really did,” Penny enthused as she and Sheldon climbed the stairs back towards their respective apartments. “I mean I’ve seen it before, but when stuff doesn’t make sense you’re pretty good at explaining it,” she smiled.

“The Star Wars canon is vast, but for the original movie, it’s not really necessary to know all of the background. Those that saw it in 1977 were just completely in awe of what are now considered primitive special effects and the new leaps and bounds being made in the science fiction movie genre.”

“Well, it impresses me,” said Penny definitely. “I mean, sure, you can kind of tell the space ships are models sometimes and some of those aliens things in the bar...”

“The Mos Eisley Cantina,” he corrected gently.

“Sorry, the cantina,” Penny acquiesced. “They were clearly guys in costumes, but hey, there’s only so much you can do, especially way back when.”

Sheldon couldn’t help but smile at her enthusiasm for a movie he had not been convinced she would enjoy. Whilst the original Star Wars was still a masterpiece in his eyes, and all the better for being shown in its original theatrical version rather than George Lucas’ travesty of a special edition, Sheldon knew Penny was not much of a sci-fi fan. Still, it had been she that insisted it was the movie they should see together on their first date.

“You took me to a great restaurant, you’ve been a total gentleman all night, and you’re paying for everything,” she had said as they surveyed their choices outside the movie theatre. “You should get to see a movie you love instead of some chick flick or whatever just because I like seeing Channing Tatum get naked,” she had told him, and though Sheldon really wasn’t sure who she was talking about, he just headed for the desk as quickly as possible and got them two tickets for what they now called ‘A New Hope’.

“I am glad you enjoyed the movie, Penny,” he told her as they reached her door and faced each other. “I have the other two from the trilogy on dvd, and Blu-Ray, and special edition dvd, and VHS... I also have the prequel trilogy but that is an even bigger continuity nightmare,” he rambled on a moment before shaking his head. “If you would like to see them, it could be arranged?”

“Yeah, that might be nice,” Penny agreed, shifting awkwardly before him.

This was the end of their first date, and she knew what came next. Some guys would kiss her goodnight and then leave with a promise to call. Others would be dragged to her bed for a night of passion, leaving in the morning with similar vows to call her. There were few that ever did call actually. It made her sad to think about it, and yet happy because she had much more of a guarantee with Sheldon.

“Well,” he said then, looking as oddly nervous as she felt. “I had a very pleasant evening, Penny. Thank you for your company.”

“Thank you, Sheldon, I had a great time too,” she assured him.

Still he didn’t move away and she was glad in a sense and annoyed in another. If he was just going to stand there they were never going to get anywhere. He couldn’t be afraid of kissing her, not after all those times before, and yet he looked confused or just terrified maybe.

“Sheldon?” she got his attention, their eyes meeting.

“I... I’m not sure of the correct protocol,” he said, sounding a little too much like the gold robot from the movie they just watched, See Threepio if Penny wasn’t mistaken.

She bit her lip so she wouldn’t laugh at the comparison that came to mind unbidden. The last thing Sheldon needed right now was for her to mock his lack of confidence.

“The protocol is we say goodnight,” she told him, stepping in closer.

She had to be the bold one, it seemed. For all his domineering ways before, grabbing her and kissing the breath out of her on no less than two previous occasions, he didn’t feel so confident now. Penny was quite sure enough for the both of them when it came to this part of the night. Her arms went up a round his neck and she pulled him down to her level.

“Goodnight, Sheldon,” she said softly.

“Goodnight, Penny,” he replied in kind right before she kissed him.

It wasn’t the deep passionate moment that had come before. Just a sweet, slow, melding of mouths that left the both of them a little dizzy. Their foreheads rested together and she smiled at seeing the same expression on his lips.

“I think we can safely say the first date was a success.”

“I concur,” he breathed as they parted at last and Penny unlocked her apartment to go inside.

She threw Sheldon a little wave as she went inside. Leaning back against the closed door for a moment, Penny closed her eyes and just let all the feelings she was having wash over her. She was dating Sheldon Cooper, and as crazy as it might sound, she couldn’t be happier.


	13. Chapter 13

It was dark outside, nothing but the vastness of space, no home planet to run to anymore. Alderaan was gone and Princess Penny mourned its loss from her prison cell. She ought to be afraid of the enemies that would keep her here, but she wasn’t. There were guys in her life aplenty to come save her and they were all pretty smart. She just lay back on her bunk, filing her nails until they arrived.

A noise outside the door got her attention, and then suddenly it slid open and he walked in, blue shirt catching the light, pointy ears never looking so sexy on anyone else before. Princess Penny wasn’t sure when she started thinking this way about the great Sheldon Spock, but she wanted him, that much was certain.

“You came for me!” she exclaimed, leaping from the bed and into his arms.

“Of course,” he said into her ridiculous buns of blonde hair. “Nobody else had the brain capacity to figure out how to save you,” he told her definitely.

“You were my only hope,” whispered Princess Penny as she pulled back to meet his eyes.

“And as illogical as it seems, you are all I want,” Sheldon Spock told her, right before their lips met.

They were supposed to be running for their lives, and Princess Penny knew it. She was also pretty sure something was weird if he was Spock and she was an Alderaanian princess, and yet when she felt the white robes fall from her shoulders, the searing kiss flooding her body with heat, she couldn’t care at all.

The door shut and bolted itself somewhere behind Sheldon Spock, and the world went away. Princess Penny surrendered to the feelings he could evoke in her, as he laid her down on the bed and took her to a whole other galaxy, far, far away.

* * *

_Knock, knock, knock_

“Penny?”

_Knock, knock, knock_

“Penny?”

_Knock, knock, knock_

“Penny?”

No reply came to Sheldon’s frantic knocking. In desperation he chose to use the spare key Penny had given him and Leonard so long ago. After all, to his mind, this was most definitely an emergency. He had to talk to Penny, he had to have her confirm that she would never do what she had just done inside the most terrible nightmare.

On any normal day he knew better than to believe his dreams were anything more than his subconscious mind sorting through the events of the day, old memories, and random thoughts. Dreams were representations of the brains filing system being shuffled around, no different to defragmenting a computer, and yet this particular dream was so vivid, a fusion of his most recent memories and well-known television scenes, he had to see Penny and ensure she understood what their relationship was to entail before it was too late.

Sheldon came rushing into Penny’s bedroom without a thought in his head but talking over his troubles with her. Touching her seemed wrong when she was sleeping soundly still, her back to him when he entered the room. They had kissed and touched quite enough before, he shouldn’t be so afraid of just tapping her shoulder or similar. Instead, he chose to repeat his knocking ritual on the nightstand.

Penny woke up gasping, scrambling to find where the noise was coming from. She flung her arms out as she turned, felling Sheldon like a tree. He landed on the bed, practically on top of her, and that helped not one bit.

“Oh my God,” she gasped, looking up into his eyes. “Sheldon...”

She couldn’t say anymore because she didn’t have the breath to speak. That was one hell of a dream she had been having, the memory of it etched into her brain so bright she wondered if it would ever fade. Penny was sure it had been a dream, and yet Sheldon was right here. She shook her head.

“How long have you been here?” she asked shakily.

“No more than a minute,” he replied.

There was a long moment when she didn’t say a word, just stared up into his eyes with the strangest smile on her lips. Sheldon wasn’t sure what she was thinking or planning to do. He decided best not to find out, not even to ask, as he got up off the bed and stepped back away from her, his hands clasped behind his back.

“I had a nightmare,” he told her, much like a little boy who just came running to Mommy.

Penny couldn’t even begin to describe how inappropriate that felt in this moment more than any other. This was not a scene that should follow an erotic dream. Sitting up and pushing her hands back through her hair, she tried to shake off the dream and focus on the reality. Sheldon needed help and she had always been there to give it. Help and comfort, it was what she always tried to provide and that couldn’t change now that they were dating. If anything, it ought to make her more willing to be there when he needed her.

“Sheldon, honey, why don’t we, er... why don’t we go through to the living room and sit down,” she said, swinging her legs out of bed and heading out.

Sheldon dutifully followed, but whilst Penny threw herself into the cushions of the couch, he didn’t sit down with her. He started pacing, up and down the room, hands fidgeting, eyes darting. He had on his pyjamas and a plaid robe tied tight around him, not exactly a sexy look, and yet Penny was seeing the scenes from her head and it made her ache in places. She shook her head again.

“I had a dream, Penny, in fact it was a nightmare,” he exclaimed so suddenly, she jumped. “I... I was Spock and you...”

“Hold on a second, you dreamt you were Spock?” she checked, wondering if it were actually possible that her dream and his nightmare had collided somehow.

It was nuts, no doubt about it, but stranger things had happened, she supposed. Hell, she was dating Sheldon Cooper, stranger things already were happening!

“I often dream that I’m Spock,” he said, looking at Penny as if she just asked the most ridiculous question he ever heard. “But that is beside the point!” he declared as he resumed pacing. “I dreamt that I was Spock and you were Zarabeth. We were in the caves, and I told you that you were beautiful and I kissed you.”

“Hold on, this was a nightmare?” asked Penny, the serene smile that had started to form on her lips disappearing in an instant. “Not flattering, Sheldon.”

“That part wasn’t the nightmare,” he rolled his eyes as he whirled to face her. “Are you not familiar with the concept of dreams taking dramatic turns? A perfectly nice dream that one is enjoying suddenly plunging into the dark torment of a nightmare?”

“Well, I guess...” Penny shrugged.

Sheldon took that as an invitation to carry on, both with his pacing and the explanation of his supposed terrible experience.

“So, I, as Spock, was kissing you, as Zarabeth, but then Dr McCoy came and I know Bones was supposed to convince me to leave. Its in the script, I know how it should happen, but I broke canon. I stayed. I stayed with her... with you,” he told Penny, all in a panic. “I stayed and then the walls started to crumble and then Vader walked in...”

“Hold on a second,” Penny waved her hands for him to stop and her face showed real confusion when he looked at her. “Vader as in Darth Vader?”

Sheldon looked incredulous.

“Exactly how many Vaders do you know of?”

Penny shook her head. That had been a pretty dumb question. It wasn’t as if you couldn’t mash up your Star Wars with your Star Trek in a weird dream. Hadn’t that been what she was doing when Sheldon walked into her room and woke her up? The memory of her dream washed over her, and with it a hundred feelings that she had to repress at least for now. She shuddered and refocused.

“Okay, so Darth Vader in a dream where you’re Spock and I’m... I’m guessing some Star Trek chick?”

“Zarabeth of Sarpeidon,” said Sheldon, finding it tiresome to have to repeat himself apparently.

“Obviously,” Penny nodded, though she was no further forward.

“But the point is, I gave in,” he continued to explain. “I gave up everything for a woman, a temptress, a harlot!”

“Hey, I am not!” she protested those words, but Sheldon didn’t seen seem to hear her.

“I’m so confused!” he declared helplessly, dropping down onto the couch next to Penny with his face in his hands.

She just didn’t know what to say to him. She wouldn’t have thought that Sheldon would put so much stock into a dream. He looked at things so logically, that was chief amongst the things he had in common with Spock actually. Whatever had caused him to suddenly pay any mind to a nightmare and get so worked up, Penny still felt the need to help him.

“Oh, sweetie,” she sighed, putting her arm around him. “You know things don’t have to get so dramatic and scary just because we’re dating now,” she assured him. “We can take things slow and figure things out as we go along. There’s no pressure.”

Penny felt ridiculous saying these things. Usually it was the guy that had to promise the emotional woman that everything was going to be okay, that there was no need to worry, that there didn’t have to be pressure for anything. Role reversal coupled with role playing in their dreams made the whole situation seem all the more insane. Penny bit her lip so she didn’t laugh about it. That would be the last thing Sheldon needed right now.

“I am not equipped for this,” he said then, moving his hands away from his face as he looked at her. “Penny, I know so much of science and technology. Facts and figures come easily to me, everything based in logic,” he explained. “What I have with you is based on feelings that I do not understand, on urges and instincts I thought I was far beyond. I don’t know how I’m supposed to behave, what my future will become if I truly am a lesser being than I assumed. You... you could be my downfall, and I’m afraid I’m willing to let that happen.”

Penny was beyond flattered by what he was telling her, and completely at a loss as to how to respond. Of course, the truth was he had started to let his life fall into anarchy before they ever got together. It was the slide in chaos that brought him to a moment where he felt willing enough to kiss her, and from there this whole thing had developed so fast. It was overwhelming for the both of them, and Sheldon’s panic at a situation he had no control over, after so many years of carefully planning every little thing was understandable, it had just chosen to come out in a dream rather than occurring to him when awake.

“Sheldon, honey, listen to me,” said Penny, rubbing his back. “I know this is weird for you, the whole dating thing. Honestly, it’s weird for me too, because it’s you and me, and that’s... it’s different,” she said eventually. “But things don’t have to change that much. I don’t want to ruin you or change you. I love you for you and that’s...”

“You love me?” he interrupted.

It was only when she heard the question that she even realised what she had said. Penny’s eyes went wide with shock.

“No,” she told him quickly, definitely, or so she thought. “I mean, yeah but... I didn’t mean...”

She was rambling and they both knew it. Penny didn’t know how to explain herself. Of course she loved Sheldon, she loved all her friends, but things were different now. They were dating, he was here and so close, and from her dream she could still feel his lips on hers. She knew the reality well and ached to fall into a moment here, but it wasn’t the time. She had just said she loved him and he took it to mean deep, passionate, romantic love. Now that Penny was considering it, she really wasn’t sure if she had meant it that way or not.

Sheldon was panicking. He always wanted to be loved, revered, worshipped perhaps, but this was different. Amy said she loved him but he couldn’t feel so deeply for her. His emotions were only ever stirred by Penny and now she was telling him she might be in love with him. A part of him thought he was supposed to say it back and yet he had no idea if he could or should.

“I should go,” he said fast, suddenly up from the seat, out of her arms, and headed for the door.

“Wait, Sheldon!” Penny called after him, giving chase.

They stumbled out into the hallway, one after the other, Penny running into Sheldon’s back when he stopped sharply. It was only when she peered around his shoulder that she realised what the issue was.

“Hi,” she greeted Leonard awkwardly, suddenly highly aware of her the fact she was only wearing skimpy shorts and a vest top that she had been sleeping in, and that Sheldon was in nightwear too.

“Good to see you didn’t waste any time moving on,” said her ex, before striding into his apartment and slamming the door.


	14. Chapter 14

Though Leonard had slammed his way back into the apartment, he hadn’t locked the door. Sheldon followed with ease and found his room-mate sat on the couch with his bag at his feet, sorting through his laundry.

“This is the living room,” said Sheldon pointlessly.

“I’m aware of that, thanks,” his friend replied, making a mess with the contents of his bag. “I know you’re a genius, but strangely the rest of us can also navigate our own apartment without help.”

Sheldon didn’t care for the attitude, but then that was just the way Leonard was sometimes, especially when he was angry about something.

“I suppose you assume that finding myself and Penny coming from her apartment at such an hour in a state of semi-undress must mean that we engaged in coitus,” he said, in the way that only Sheldon Cooper could. “Not that I understand why it should matter to you, but your assumption is incorrect. Whilst I admit, myself and Penny are in a state of being that she describes as dating, and I am inclined to agree it suits the situation, we have not had anything akin to a real sexual encounter...”

“Sheldon!” snapped Leonard, really not wanting to hear this, going so far as to put his hands over his ears to make his point very clear. “I don’t want to know,” he declared, hands falling away from his head as he got up from the couch. “You may not have been getting lucky this weekend, but I did,” he said smartly. “I met a girl in Vegas.”

“Was she a prostitute?” asked Sheldon immediately.

Leonard’s eyes were wide and his mouth set in an angry line at that remark. His friend stared back at him, unsure what was unreasonable about his question. Sheldon knew Las Vegas was frequented by regular people, not just hookers and thieves, but there were a lot of those types there too. Besides, he heard from Leonard himself that he and Raj paid for a prostitute to sleep with Howard last time he was feeling lonely and dumped. Sheldon could see no reason why the same logic would not apply in this situation.

“For your information, Zoe was a very charming, very hot young woman who thought I was the best man and greatest lover she had in a very long time,” he said definitely, puling a piece of paper from his pocket and handing it to Sheldon.

His friend gawked at the note, hastily written on a piece of hotel memo paper. In it, this Zoe person described Leonard just as he said. She implied that she had to leave before he woke due to a prior engagement and that she was afraid of how much she felt during the night before. She could never see Leonard again because she liked him too much. A week ago, Sheldon wouldn’t have understood that sentiment at all. Things were different now.

“This could be a fabrication,” he considered aloud, even as Leonard snatched the paper back from his hands. “But I do see how she could be quite distressed by what she felt for you. I myself am suffering greatly with romantic impulses that I cannot comprehend, and I highly doubt a woman you picked up in a Vegas bar has half the number of IQ points that I possess.”

Leonard had a hundred things he would like to say in reply to that. Chief among them was ‘Shut up, Sheldon!’ and yet he said nothing. He hadn’t thought much about Sheldon’s feelings in all of this, only of his own. He saw another man kiss his girlfriend, not once but twice. They pretty much cheated on him, his girlfriend and his best friend, but even Leonard knew there really wasn’t much to cheat on by the end. As much as he loved Penny, and was sure he always would, they didn’t really work as a couple, for a multitude of reasons that faded in and out of his mind during a weekend long drinking session. Leonard should have known better than to think Sheldon took Penny from him just for the sake of it, or because he was looking for an easy lay. That wasn’t Sheldon, it wasn’t really Penny either.

“These feelings you have for Penny,” he said, looking more at the carpet than Sheldon as he refolded his letter from Zoe and pushed it into his back pocket. “How long have those existed exactly?”

Sheldon seemed to consider that question a very long time before he finally answered. 

“I don’t know,” he replied honestly. “Were I to be completely truthful with you, as I have tried to be with both myself and Penny, I would have to say that something has been different about my relationship with her from the very first day we met,” he admitted then, shifting awkwardly in place. “I never suspected I could feel as much as I do. As you will doubtless recall, I laughed derisively when you yourself professed your attraction to Penny,” he reminded Leonard of things he knew far too well already.

“Are you telling me you didn’t think Penny would want to be with me because she would rather be with you? From the day she moved in?” his friend checked, frowning hard, arms folded across his chest as he waited for the answer.

Sheldon couldn’t decide if his room-mate was still mad at him or just curious now. When he left for Vegas he had been upset, but now he was listening intently, asking questions, as if he were trying to be helpful. If it were true, then it was wonderful. On the other hand, Sheldon was wary that continuing in this vein might only make matters worse. He was not certain Leonard would like to hear more about his own developing relationship with Penny, but for as long as he was asking, Sheldon would answer.

“I had no interest in Penny in the beginning, at least, none that I was acutely aware of,” he said, passing by Leonard to sit in his usual spot on the couch. “My dismissive attitude regarding your chances with her were based purely on your incompatibility, your awful track record when it comes to dating women, and Penny’s complete disregard for you in any capacity other than a useful neighbour, at least at that time,” he explained. 

Leonard couldn’t deny Sheldon had a point. He often wondered himself if Penny dated him out of pity or because it was easier for her to be in control of a relationship for a change. Perhaps she just wanted a smart guy on her list after so many meat-heads. If Leonard were honest with himself, he knew he and Penny were better at being friends than lovers, he just didn’t want to give up the dream of being the geek that ended up with the hot blonde. That was maybe the one thing more pathetic than having to admit to losing a woman to Sheldon.

“So, you and Penny went out on a date, huh?” he said, sitting down beside Sheldon and removing his glasses a moment to rub his tired eyes. “How’d that go?”

“Shockingly well,” Sheldon admitted, looking visibly surprised himself. “We had a remarkably pleasant meal, a reasonable conversation, and then we saw the original theatrical release of Star Wars at the multiplex. I was quite surprised by how interested Penny was in the movie,” he smiled softly.

Leonard wasn’t sure he had never seen that look on his friends face before, and then it hit him. The only times when Sheldon had even been close to looking so happy, so genuinely serene, was when Penny did something especially for him. That Christmas when she got him Leonard Nemoy’s autograph. The time she gave up a chance to go to Switzerland to let him go see the hadron collider. Any time when Penny was sweet and perfect as she could be sometimes and all for Sheldon, plus a few other occasions when she said something he appreciated or looked particularly happy about something. Leonard collated the data in a second and knew for sure that all those looks, those soft eyes and gentle smiles, they were reserved for ‘Penny moments’ for lack of a better term.

Before Leonard had a chance to fully process and give any kind of response, Sheldon hit him with the next revelation.

“She said she loved me.”

That actually didn’t come as a huge revelation to Leonard, and he had his reasons as to why.

“Of course she said that, because that’s Penny, but there are all different kinds of love, Sheldon,” he explained. “You love your mother in a different way from how you love science and that’s a different way again from how you love somebody that you’re actually in love with.”

“She didn’t say she was in love with me,” his friend said quickly. “Though I could well understand it if she were. Do you think I’m in love with Penny?” he asked, though didn’t seem to require any help in answering the question as he rambled on by himself. “I mean, I suppose I could be. I care that she is well and happy, and apparently she can stir certain sexual feelings in me that I hardly knew I could have. Is that all there is to being in love?”

He looked to Leonard for a response on that last part, the one area of the questioning that he had the least sensible answer for.

“I don’t know, Sheldon. I really don’t think I’m the guy to ask,” he shook his head. “I mean, was I in love with Penny? I care about her, I’m sexually attracted to her, but it has to be more than that, doesn’t it?” he shrugged helplessly. “Otherwise any pair of attractive friends, regardless of other factors, would just be a couple, get married. It doesn’t always work that way.”

For such geniuses, the two of them felt suddenly very stupid. There they sat together on the couch, both mulling over what feelings they had for the woman across the hall, what her feelings were for each of them. Love was such a strange subject to consider. It wasn’t quite the factual entity that it should be. There was no math or science to it, no definite answers. It was the one thing that could confound two entirely brainy people and reduce them to drink, tears, nightmares, and stupidity apparently.

“Leonard,” said Sheldon after a very long pause. “Are you still angry with me for taking your girlfriend away from you?” he asked too seriously.

“No,” his friend admitted with a heavy sigh. “Though I might be if you keep phrasing it that way. You didn’t take Penny. She didn’t want to be with me anymore, and she found she was attracted to you, as crazy as that still sounds to say,” he considered aloud. “Anyway, it’s not like you were being malicious. I should’ve learned by now that you just act as you see fit and genuinely don’t consider the feelings of others because... well, you don’t have that many feelings of your own, I guess.”

“I didn’t used to,” Sheldon sighed just as heavily as his friend had done a moment ago. “Now all I seem to have is feelings and all because of Penny. That troublesome wench will be my undoing.”

Leonard smirked at a few double-entendres that came to mind, and then just as fast shuddered at the implication. Still the smile was back a moment later as he stared across at his friend who had finally found out what it was to be in love, potentially anyway. Sheldon Cooper was in a relationship, and not the make-pretend farce that he and Amy had, but a real dating type relationship with a real woman who liked fun and sex and normal activities that weren’t considered geeky at all. Things were going to get interesting.

“You still glad you let anarchy reign in your previously well-ordered life?” asked Leonard, not sure what response he expected from his friend.

It used to be so obvious how he would react before but things were so different now, it was very hard to judge, even for a guy who knew Sheldon so well and had lived with him all these years.

“Honestly, I don’t think I can be sorry about it,” said Sheldon eventually, after much thought that showed on his every feature. “What I shared with Amy Farrah-Fowler was perfectly fine, but it was neither the friendship I wanted nor the romance she desired. With Penny, I have the best of both worlds, at least so far. As confusing at it is to find myself in this relationship, I don’t think I would want to give it up.”

Leonard was astounded to hear Sheldon talking this way. He knew he cared for Penny, he did care for all his friends in his own special Sheldon-esque way, but Leonard never thought he would live to see the day when Sheldon fell in love. Despite the confusion over whether or not love existed between himself and Penny, and the definition of what kind of love, Leonard was fairly certain that this was the real deal for Sheldon and Penny. It still hurt to realise that what Leonard had with her was almost as make believe and far-fetched as Sheldon and Amy had been, but that was just something he would have to get over. In the cold light of the morning after a drunken one-nighter in Vegas, Leonard felt surprisingly okay about it.


	15. Chapter 15

When there was a knocking on her door, Penny really wasn’t sure who she expected to be on the other side. She couldn’t even have said who she might have wanted it to be, except for a guy with a cheque saying she just won lotto and didn’t have to go to work tonight. It was quite the surprise when she opened her door and found Amy waiting on the other side.

“Hey, bestie,” she smiled, just like always.

Penny was astounded as she let Amy into the apartment and watched her make herself comfortable on the couch. It was almost as if nothing had happened, as if everything were completely normal, though of course it wasn’t and never could be again. Sheldon had been dating Amy and now he was with Penny. She had effectively stolen a friend’s man, and not for the first time, though at least on this occasion Penny could say she had absolutely no intention of doing so. Maybe that made it better, but she was still bemused as to how Amy could be so calm and smiley after everything.

“So, um, how have you been?” asked Penny as she came to sit down beside her friend.

“Oh, not bad,” Amy shrugged. “I helped my Aunt Flora celebrate her 93rd birthday; perfected all of Bon Jovi’s greatest hits on the harp; sent back some lingerie I ordered to please Sheldon though I doubt it would’ve worked anyway... the usual stuff.”

Penny shifted awkwardly.

“Your aunt is ninety three?” she asked, because she had to say something and every other topc was just so uncomfortable. “Wow, good for her,” she smiled awkwardly.

Amy sighed.

“You don’t have to be skittish about the mentioning of your latest paramour, just because he used to be mine,” she assured her bestie. “I told you already, I’m not mad at you, I still want us to be friends. You want that too, right?” she checked.

“Of course!” said Penny immediately. “Of course I do, Amy, I’m not... I just feel a little weird about all this.”

“It’s fine,” Amy insisted. “I just have to learn to live with the fact that I was not woman enough for Sheldon Cooper.”

Penny scoffed at that remark, she just couldn’t help it.

“Oh, honey, no,” she shook her head definitely, her hand at Amy’s shoulder. “For a while there we weren’t sure if Sheldon even liked girls, or boys for that matter,” she considered as she got up and headed for the kitchen.

“He always liked you, Penny,” said Amy without a moment’s pause.

Penny’s hand stilled on the glasses she was retrieving a moment.

“I don’t know about that.”

“I do,” her friend insisted. “If Sheldon needs advice about a relationship, who does he go to?”

“Well, me, I guess,” said Penny, pouring two healthy measures of white wine for herself and Amy.

“And if he feels sick or lonely or sad?”

“Also me,” she answered Amy’s next question like a reflex as she retook her seat on the couch, the realisation suddenly hitting her. “Wow, Sheldon really does depend on me. I guess I never noticed before. I just... I’m there for him. I like being there for him,” she shrugged.

“Because you care,” smiled Amy, albeit there was a sad edge to the expression somehow. “And it does make sense that the woman taking care of Sheldon’s emotional needs could end up taking care of his physical needs also.”

Penny choked a little on her wine.

“Oh, I’m not... I mean, we haven’t...”

“You’ve kissed, more than once,” her friend pointed out. “Sheldon has initiated more intimacy with you in one week than he allowed with me in three months!”

Penny felt sad then, for Amy and for Sheldon. They should have been perfect for each other on the surface. Both science-minded, inexperienced in love and romance, it should’ve worked out perfectly. Of course it was opposites that attracted, but Penny always thought she and Sheldon were way too opposite for anything to ever really happen. Now here sat Amy pointing out how very much Sheldon liked her, that she was the one and only person in the world that had ever inspired him to want to be intimate and sexual. Penny was genuinely at a loss.

“I honestly don’t know why.”

“I do!” Amy told her, actually raising her hand as if needing to be picked to answer the question from a group of one. “Look in a mirror, toots, you’re practically flawless,” she said, making Penny stare at her strangely. “Pretty face, blonde hair, smokin’ body, the rest of us just can’t compete. All that, plus you know Sheldon, you care for him, you’re his friend. That, bestie, is the whole package.”

When she put it like that it was hard to argue with her. Penny smiled as she leaned back into the couch cushions and considered all that Amy said. Maybe she and Sheldon were as genuinely suited to each other as her friend said, even if it did sound crazy on the surface.

“He means a lot to me,” she said thoughtfully. “Probably more than I realised until recently.”

“I know, and that’s why I’m not bitter,” Amy shrugged, sipping her wine. “You’ll be good for him, Penny. You’ll take care of him, treat him well, and probably end up pleasuring him in ways I could only dream of,” she continued, eyes getting hazy, voice getting soft as she continued. “Just think of his sinewy hands on your hot flesh, your voluptuous breasts pressed up against his chest, lips on skin, the heat of passion rising between you...” she gasped a little and then leapt up from her seat. “I have to go!”

Penny was just going to ask what the hell was going on when suddenly Amy was out the door. Her friend ran after her, calling her name, but to no avail, she was already long gone.

“Okay, bye!” she yelled in Amy’s wake, pointlessly waving her hand.

She turned back from the stairs and ran right into Leonard coming out of his and Sheldon’s place.

“Hey,” she greeted him.

“Hey,” he replied in kind.

There they stood for a full minute or two, staring past each other, not knowing whether it was right to speak or just walk away. Eventually, they both managed to say the exact same thing, almost in perfect unison;

“Sorry about before.”

It made the both of them laugh, breaking a little of the tension. Penny cleared her throat and started over.

“Leonard, I really, really didn’t mean for this to happen,” she assured him.

He smiled at that, because honestly, he couldn’t believe anyone saw this coming.

“I know,” he nodded. “Hey, I don’t think even Nostradamus himself could’ve predicted this one.”

Penny frowned; “The vampire guy?”�“No, actually, that was Nosferatu,” Leonard corrected her. “It’s, er... never mind,” he waved away the whole thing, knowing it wasn’t important anyway.

Penny nodded her head, started to move towards her own apartment again. They both said they were sorry, there was little else to be done now. Still, she couldn’t quite make it back to her own door without asking one more thing.

“Are you okay?” she said, turning back a moment.

Leonard smiled.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he assured her. “I met a woman in Vegas.”

“Uh-huh,” Penny nodded and bit her lip, knowing he was either lying or exaggerating, especially when he went on.

“Probably broke her heart when I left to come home, but y’know, gotta keep my options open.”

“Okay,” she agreed, not willing to cut him off at the knees when he was putting on his best brave face. “Y’know, Leonard, it wasn’t all about Sheldon. Things with us...”

“I know,” he nodded. “Sheldon was the catalyst but he wasn’t the cause. You and me, it was always fun, but... well, we weren’t meant to be, I guess.”

Penny looked to the floor, feeling bad. It wasn’t her fault it didn’t work out, and it wasn’t Leonard’s fault either. Sometimes things just didn’t work out, but that didn’t stop Penny from feeling guilty. Of all the people she could have moved onto, Leonard’s best friend seemed in particularly bad taste, but she simply couldn’t help it.

“I’m sorry,” she said anyway, because she just felt she needed to.

“Me too,” Leonard replied sincerely.

He knew he hadn’t acted in the best way over this whole situation. It had been clear for a very long time now that he and Penny weren’t really working as a couple, but he refused to let go. Leonard honestly hadn’t expected Penny and Sheldon to be a couple, not ever, but he wasn’t so mad about it really, just a little disappointed that he had pinned so much hope on a dream that was only ever that.

“So, Sheldon said that you, er, you told him you loved him?” he said as she made to go through her door a second time.

Once more she turned back without ever making it over the threshold.

“Is he still freaked out?” she asked.

What Leonard noticed more than how awkward she looked was that she wasn’t denying or further explaining anything. That was interesting.

“A little, yeah,” he confirmed. “It’s a lot for the guy to take in. He let chaos into his life, then leapt right into all of these other changes, and then... the most beautiful, wonderful woman says she loves him,” he smiled a little sadly. “Any guy would be bowled over by that. I would be.”

Penny felt a lump in her throat that she fought to swallow down.

“Leonard...”

He shook his head before she could find words enough to elaborate.

“Go talk to, Sheldon,” he urged her, hiking his thumb towards his own apartment door. “I’ll be a while,” he assured her, making a brief gesture towards his basket of laundry as he finally went off down the stairs, leaving Penny alone.

Looking from the now empty stairway to the door across the hall from her, Penny took in a deep breath and then exhaled. Leonard was right, she did need to talk to Sheldon, and better now than later when she had too much time to think... and drink. That could end badly.

Quickly walking over and knocking, she felt stupidly startled when Sheldon opened the door a second later.

“Hello, Penny,” he greeted her politely.

“Hey, Sheldon,” she replied, smiling up at him. “Er, can I come in?”

He nodded and moved aside for her to enter. Once in the apartment, Penny considered sitting for all of a second before she realised there was no way to be still right now. She paced back and forth a little, then looked up and found Sheldon still hovering by the now-closed door, apparently as clueless on how to behave as she was. It was oddly comforting to realise once again she was not alone in being baffled and bowled over by their situation.

“So, before, when I said I love you...” she began awkwardly. “Sheldon, what I meant was, well, I’ve always loved you, and Leonard, and Raj, and... I love all my friends,” she tried to explain, but realised too late she was doing so very badly. “I didn’t mean to freak you out by suddenly saying ‘I love you’ like a declaration of something.”

“I understand,” Sheldon nodded. “There are different types of love. Familial, fraternal, romantic, even that which is applied to inanimate objects or activities, such as my love for trains and yours for shoes.” 

Penny couldn’t help but smile at his odd explanation that seemed to continue perfectly on from her own. Sheldon got it, he understood. She ought to have known he would, after all, he was a very smart guy, but the two of them rarely got the same thing at the same time. It was nice.

“So, we’re good?” she checked, fairly confident the answer would be yes.

Of course this was Sheldon so a one word answer would never be enough.

“If by good you mean happy and comfortable in each other’s company once again, understanding that we both have feelings of love for each other that are as yet undefined in strength and type, then yes, I suppose we are good,” he declared eventually, and then he smiled too.

They were okay, stood six feet apart across the living room carpet with silly grins on their faces that should really only belong to kids in the candy store or similar, but that was okay, in fact, it was good.

“I’m honestly not sure what happens next,” said Sheldon suddenly, leaning over some as he spoke more quietly than usual.

Penny thought it was so cute that he was practically whispering a secret to her at such a distance, and in a room with no other people. Somehow she didn’t think Sheldon would appreciate being called cute, but she thought it nonetheless.

“Well, I guess we’re dating and we’re good, so...” 

Penny walked forward to close the wide gap between them, stopping just a pace from Sheldon. He looked nervous, knowing something was going to happen but not what that something was. Penny reached for his hand and pulled until his arm wrapped around her waist, the other following out of instinct, she supposed. Her own hands came to rest at his shoulders and she looked up at him through her lashes with a smile.

“I have to go to work now, but I’m glad things are good with us,” she told him. “You want to swing by the Cheesecake factory later?”

“I suppose I could, if it would please you,” Sheldon told her.

“It would please me,” she assured him, reaching up to kiss him.

Penny half expected him to resist or at least look freaked out but once again Sheldon surprised her. He ended up closing the last of the distance between them himself as they shared a sweet kiss. This was how it was going to be for now, Penny thought, and she liked that realisation very much.


	16. Chapter 16

A week had passed and in that time things had settled into some kind of routine and normalcy again. It wasn’t exactly surprising that each person in the group needed a little time to adjust to what had happened. Even now, as they all gathered in Apartment 4A for their first dinner together since this whole thing started, Amy wasn’t present. She had forgiven both Sheldon and Penny, but said it would be too hard to see them together yet. Perhaps that was what made it so strange that Leonard was okay with everything already, but Sheldon had an answer for that, and it wasn’t that Leonard was over Penny thanks to his liaison in Vegas.

“I often wondered,” he said thoughtfully when he and his room-mate were alone the day before. “Were you really dating Penny because she was the one for you, or moreover because she was your best chance at having a stereotypically desirable girlfriend?”

It was a rhetorical question that he announced before disappearing to the bathroom, but it certainly gave Leonard a lot to think about. He didn’t like the idea that people saw his relationship with Penny that way. He knew that he loved her and that she loved him. They had fun together, they were close, but when all was said and done, they were probably no better than friends with benefits.

Penny was easier to get along with than most other women because she couldn’t exactly get away from Leonard’s efforts to woo her, living as close as she did. She was a nice person, kind and sweet, and in the end Leonard had to wonder if she hadn’t ended up with him out of habit and necessity rather than true desire, true love. Now he saw her with Sheldon, and Leonard knew for sure what they had was real, what he and Penny had was all a charade. It was sad to realise, but he was man enough to accept it, which he hoped said something good about his character and his growing as a person.

Their friends were smart enough not to make too many comments. Raj had a tendency to stare whenever Sheldon and Penny got even remotely cute, but then he would pretty much stare at any couple who were anything like close just because he was that desperate. Bernadette said several times how adorable the new couple were, and behind her hand when they weren’t listening, how amazing it was to see Sheldon behave like a person. That part at least Howard could agree with, but not too vocally. After all, it was pretty much a miracle that he got a woman like Bernadette, he couldn’t exactly judge where Penny and Sheldon were concerned.

Sat around in almost their usual spots (Penny in the armchair beside Sheldon’s spot and Leonard on the extra chair to her left) things felt close to normal as they all tucked into their food. It was a little special that they were having Chinese on a Wednesday, but then so many of Sheldon’s more group-effecting habits had been quashed since his chaos epiphany. When it came to his work, he had gone back to his job. Sheldon's reasons were two-fold, one being because he was just too bored not being there, and the second because he knew it was wrong to deprive the world of one of it’s greatest scientific minds. Penny just smiled and agreed with him. As much as she was glad that Sheldon had taken a walk on the wilder side, resulting in their being together, she was totally fine with him going back to at least some of his crazy ways. He really wouldn’t be Sheldon without any of his quirks, and Penny loved him just the way he was, as nutty as that seemed.

“What?” he asked when he caught her grinning at him for no discernible reason.

“Nothing,” Penny shrugged. “I was just thinking about how things have turned out. Life’s funny.”

“Yeah, it’s frickin’ hilarious,” Raj grumbled. “I may never know the sweet touch of a woman again, or I'm going to be known as the sad act that couldn't get a girlfriend until after Sheldon already had two, one of which was smoking hot and way out of his league!”

“Hey, come on,” Leonard sympathised. “It’s not like you’re the only single guy here,” he said pointedly, deliberately not looking at Penny when he spoke.

There was no need to make her feel bad, since none of this was really her fault anyway. Raj didn’t look comforted in any case.

“At least you had a smoking hot girlfriend!” he exclaimed, swilling back another mouthful of beer. “I’m always alone, always.”

Sheldon shifted closer to Penny and whispered across to her.

“Would it be inappropriate for me to suggest Rajesh call Amy Farrah-Fowler?” he asked.

Penny opened her mouth to tell him that was a terrible plan, when suddenly she realised maybe not. Raj was a nice guy, but very nervous around women and just so lonely. Amy was similarly afflicted, being as she was awkward and alone. Maybe they really would work as a couple, and if not, it probably wouldn’t hurt if they at least had one date to see what happened.

“Um, okay,” she said eventually. “Raj, how ‘bout giving Amy a call?”

“Oh really?” he countered. “You think I’m so desperate that I want to go out with Sheldon’s old cast off?” he asked. “Because if that’s what you thought then you would be right, I’m going to call her right now!” he said quickly, getting out his cell before he even cleared the front door.

“Y’know, that might actually work,” considered Bernadette.

“The oddest couples do,” Howard agreed, looking rather pointedly at Sheldon and Penny, both of which seemed slightly affronted at being referred to in such a way. “Oh, come on! You have to admit, none of us expected you two to end up together. Penny doesn’t exactly go for the Sheldon-type, and Sheldon didn’t even go for women at all, not for the longest time.”

“That is true,” his friend agreed. “For much of my life I believed having a woman in my life in a romantic sense was not something I desired, and that even if such urges came to me, I would be put-off by the very idea of the distraction such a person would cause from my work and other important pursuits in life,” he explained. “Not to mention the hygiene issues of all the touching and bodily fluids being traded... however, as it turns out, some things or indeed people are worth making sacrifices for.”

“Aaaw,” Penny smiled at the sweet sentiment of Sheldon’s latest ramble. “Sweetie, that was beautiful.”

“I know,” he agreed, going back to his food a moment. “In any case,” he continued on the moment he swallowed the next forkful. “I have learnt almost everything I can in the fields of physics and math, to name but two, from the experts in those areas. Now I’m learning of romance and love from a teacher that knows much more than I ever could hope to. It just makes good sense,” he shrugged,

Penny couldn’t help thinking she came off a little slutty in that analogy but she let it go since she wasn’t sure. Besides Sheldon did just call her an expert in something and a good teacher, as far as she could tell, and that she was having to be for him when it came to a romantic relationship. The sex side of things was still going slowly, and so far they really hadn’t gotten further than second base a couple of times, but Penny could deal. It was kind of nice to take things slow for once, not just leap into bed because that was where the feelings took her. Sheldon was different, very different from all the other guys she dated, even different from Leonard in a whole long list of ways, but Penny was okay with that, more than okay in fact. If it took a year for Sheldon to even slide into third, she could handle that, because it was Sheldon and somehow she knew he would be worth the wait. A smile came to her lips as Penny thought about the day when she finally got her man into bed. It might take forever, but   
she was so curious about what it would be like, her mind wandered sometimes, she just couldn’t help it. Some of those thoughts must have started to show on her face because when her eyes refocused on her boyfriend, she realised he was looking at her very strangely.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked curiously.

Penny shook her head and concentrated on her food. Leonard recognised her expression and excused himself to the bathroom. He had a feeling he knew exactly where this conversation tended and wasn’t quite ready to hear it somehow.

“Nothing I can say in polite company,” Penny hissed to Sheldon, though the others heard easily enough.

“We’re not that polite,” said Bernadette with a wicked smirk. “Tell us.”

“No!” Penny protested, feeling stupidly shy all of a sudden.

She topped-up her wine and took a long sip, effectively trying to hide in the glass. Obviously it didn’t work.

“Ooh, is it dirty?” asked Howard, clearly amused.

“Maybe,” Penny admitted, at which Sheldon looked shocked.

“Penny!” he gasped, but that just made her laugh, getting over her embarrassment in a second when she saw how scandalised he looked.

“What?” she shrugged, putting a hand to his face and leaning in until their noses almost touched. “Is it my fault that you get me so hot?”

A shudder ran through Sheldon that she felt as well as saw. He swallowed hard before shaking off the intense moment and answering her question.

“No, I don’t suppose it is,” he said as she went back to her food and he did the same.

It was difficult not to laugh at the odd but cute little scene, and that was as true for those in it as well as those watching. There was no denying that Penny and Sheldon were not an obvious pairing at first glance, but after even such a short time of really dating, it was already clear that they were well suited and very happy to be together.

“That’s it, I arranged a date with Amy, we’re going out to dinner on Friday night,” Raj grinned as he returned to the room and sat down on the floor again.

“Hey, that’s great,” said Leonard as he too returned, stopping by the fridge for a bottle of water on the way to his chair. “I really hope it works out for you two.”

“As do I,” Sheldon threw in, with what appeared to be a genuine vote of confidence. “You know this might all work out for the best. Amy Farrah-Fowler is a fine woman, but just generally not suited to a man such as myself. She may be perfect for a less educated, more emotionally unstable man like you, Raj.”

“Thank you, Sheldon,” his friend smiled, either oblivious to the lack of compliment in that sentence, or just choosing to ignore the potential insult.

Either way, at least everybody was smiling.

“You do realise if it works out with you guys, the story you get to tell your kids is how you met their mother via Crazy Uncle Sheldon,” said Leonard with a grin that proved he was making a good-natured joke.

“Well, if Penny and Sheldon work out,” Bernadette considered in response. “They’re going to have to tell their kids their romantic relationship started with a set of bongos!”

That much was at least true, no matter how much nervous laughter it caused. It seemed a little soon for anyone to be suggesting a future where Penny and Sheldon stayed together into marriage, kids, and the like. Still, neither seemed quick to deny that it might yet happen. Nobody knew what chaos the future could hold.


End file.
